


Can't Get You Out of My Head

by CaliBDiamond



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Friends to Lovers, Head Injury, Hurt/Comfort, Pining, Stranded
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-16
Updated: 2020-05-26
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:15:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 34,961
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24227209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaliBDiamond/pseuds/CaliBDiamond
Summary: Iza and Anakin are stranded on a jungle planet off in the ass-end of space.
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 34





	1. Crash Into Me

“Are you all right?”

No. No she was _not_ all right. Physically, Iza was fine. A couple bruises and bumps here and there from being tossed around the starship littered her form but nothing appeared to be broken and she had yet to find any blood. But she was now stuck with the knowledge that she might be stranded on _whatever_ planet she’d been forced to bring the bird down onto. Maybe if she’d crashed here with someone like Master Kenobi or even Master Windu, she’d feel a little more at ease. But no. _No_ —she just had to get stuck with _Anakin Skywalker_.

It had been a flight lesson. He’d learned she barely knew the basics of how to operate a ship and had taken it upon himself to give her lessons. Iza never wanted to be a pilot. She was content to just be a Jedi Knight. Never mind that this was something basic that _every_ Knight needed to know; her master would teach her in time. At least, that was what she’d been led to believe. She hadn’t known that she was responsible for seeking the lessons out herself. _Well—_ she was certainly kicking herself for not doing this sooner.

“Iza?”

“I’m fine,” holding up a hand to keep him from attempting to touch her, Iza stared out of the transparisteel at their darkening surroundings. She wasn’t sure if this place was inhabited by sentient beings. There were animals, for sure. It was hot and humid and very _green_. Too bad she’d taken them down so hard it’d knocked out the nav system. It’d be nice to know where the hell they were and whether or not it was safe. She knew they’d been out near Skog the last time she’d checked. Maybe this was one of the moons?

“You hit your head,” Anakin was attempting to put himself in her line of sight, wedging between where she was seated in the pilot’s chair and the half-dead control console. “Will you at least look at me?”

_No._

Iza gave a quick glance upward and huffed through her nose. She felt a light pang of guilt when she noticed that he was bleeding from his nose. His blue eyes seemed more concerned with her apparent injury than his own. He lifted a hand like he intended to cup her chin and she twisted away from the touch, batting him away.

“ _I’m fine_.”

Anakin made an impatient noise and sat down against the console, folding his arms. For a moment, he just stared at her. If he thought he would be able to intimidate her into looking at him again, he was dead wrong. Iza was far too used to the stares from her master. She’d long since learned to steel herself against hard looks like that. Perhaps the only person in the galaxy who _might_ be able to get her to crack, was Master Kenobi—and _only_ because his looks were gentle and intimidating at the same time. She also had something of a crush on him. That caused a bit of a weakness that made it hard to ignore him.

“Well,” Anakin said finally, pushing a long-fingered hand through his hair. “This is going to take forever to fix.”

“What do you mean _fix?_ ” **That** got her attention. Staring up at him, Iza frowned. “Can’t you just call the Temple and tell them we need help?”

“One—I don’t know where we are.” He held a finger up, his features slightly distracted as he studied her eyes. “Two—the bird isn’t totaled. I can fix it. It will just take a week or two. Three—do you _really_ want your master to know that this is how your first flight out went?”

She looked away from him again, crossing her arms. _No_. Master Windu didn’t need a reason to sigh and shake his head at her. But she also didn’t want to be stuck out here with him for _two weeks_. She was pretty sure they didn’t have enough emergency rations for that. What were they supposed to eat? Never mind that—where were they going to _sleep?_ There was only the single bed in the starship. _She was **not** sharing a bed with Anakin Skywalker_.

“I think I should get the droid out.” Sliding off the console, Anakin started down the hallway. “Your eyes don’t look right to me.”

“I said I was fine!” Iza called after him, twisting around in her seat. “I just have a headache.”

“Yeah,” going to the cabinet where the medic droid was stored, Anakin opened it and pulled it free. “But you keep zoning out and you’re slurring. I don’t know if you’ve noticed that.”

 _Slurring?_ She wasn’t slurring. The crash had left a bit of a dull ringing in her ears and her stomach was still a bit queasy from being tossed around—but she was _fine_. Jerking to attention when the flash of a blue light flickered across her vision, Iza looked up to find the droid standing over her with its diagnostic scanner beaming across her face. Behind it, Anakin wore an even more concerned expression than before.

“Jedi Tacor, I would like to run several tests to check coordination and memory.” The droid buzzed, taking a few steps back to allow her room to rise from her chair. “Please come with me.”

“Tests?”

“Standard procedure for a concussion diagnosis.”

“Concussion…” she hadn’t hit her head _that_ hard. Not that she could remember, anyway. Everything had happened so damn fast that Iza could hardly recall much except Anakin yelling at her to try and pull up and then the loud sound of the starship crashing into the ground. She’d been flung out of the chair and there’d been a bright flash of white in her eyes when she hit her head. But it hardly hurt where she’d hit it. Her body hurt more than anything. But if it would get the younger man to stop _staring_ at her like someone’s concerned brother, she’d do it. Pushing up from her seat, the brunette started to follow the droid down the hall when the floor tipped sideways and she threw her arms out as if that might help.

“ _Iza_ ,” the arms that caught her were too strong to belong to such a skinny man. It seemed almost absurd that he’d have the power to lift her as easily as one would pick up a cat. Muttering something about how she was _fine_ , Iza tried pushing against Anakin’s broad shoulders and was met with a fair amount of resistance. He was determined to carry her off to _wherever_ it was he was taking her and she could hear the droid buzzing at him somewhere behind them. The light in the room he brought her to was too bright and she turned her face towards his chest to block it out. He was saying something. She wasn’t listening. He smelled like sweat and a little like _smoke_. Cigarette smoke. She heard him kicking things around and felt him lowering her onto the surface of the single bed. The droid was still chattering behind him and the sound was grating on her headache, but nothing was worse than the light.

“Anakin,” she covered her eyes with an arm and blindly pawed out for him with the other. “Turn it _off_.”

He didn’t say anything but she felt the shift in the air when he moved away from the bed. The room went dark with the exception of the soft glow of the droid’s display panels, and she let out a soft whimper of relief.

“Thank you.”

“I’ll check on you in a few hours,” he had to be somewhere near the doorway. He sounded too far away to be beside her again. “Get some rest.”

Did she have a choice?

~*~*~*~

“ _Iza_ ,”

The brunette jolted awake with a startled gasp, horribly disoriented when she found herself in a pitch-black room and the sensation of someone standing over her. Her senses were all off. Reaching out into the Force produced a scrambled result. She could definitely feel _someone_ there, but she couldn’t identify them. Her hand instinctively went to her lightsaber and she almost couldn’t stop the panicked huff when she found it missing. _Where was she? Where was her lightsaber? What was happening?_

“Hey,” the bed dipped and Iza crawled back from the source of the weight, the suppressed panicked sound escaping when her back hit a wall. “ _Iza, it’s me_.”

What remained of her sleep-induced confusion drained away and Iza stared blindly at the figure blocking the light pouring in from the doorway. The silhouette seemed vaguely familiar, but her eyes were having a hard time adjusting. It took a moment before the day’s events began to slowly creep back into her head and she let out a helpless sound as she swallowed and fought the need to be sick.

“Anakin?”

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he spoke quietly and she could see him wave his hand. The lights went on overhead and she squeezed her eyes shut when they blinded her. After a moment or two, she was able to open them again and spent a long time just looking at him like she wasn’t sure he was real or not. He wore that concerned expression from before, but it was softer now. He still smelled like cigarettes.

“Does Master Kenobi know you smoke?” She didn’t know why that was the first thing that came out of her mouth. Iza was so jumbled and the look in his eyes made her uneasy. A brow lifted high on his head and she swore she thought she saw his lips twitch like he was fighting the urge to smirk. Clearing his throat, the younger man drew in a deep breath and poked his tongue into his cheek.

“He does not.” He confessed, looking guilty. “I haven’t made a habit of doing it very often.”

“Why now?”

“I’m a little stressed out.” Smiling tightly, he shrugged and turned a hand up. “It helps.”

“Oh.” Pressing the heel of a hand to her eye, Iza rubbed and grumbled. “Why did you wake me up?”

“That’s what the droid told me to do,” he gave her that soft look of concern once more, tilting his head slightly. “You definitely have a concussion. I’ll have to do this every couple of hours.”

“You need to sleep.”

“I’ll sleep later. _You_ are the one that needs the rest.”

“How am I meant to rest if you’re going to keep waking me up?” Giving him a look, Iza caught the smile this time before it disappeared. She wished he wouldn’t do that. It felt so weird.

“It’s only for the first half-day.”

“How long am I meant to rest?” Fixing him with a startled look, Iza straightened against the wall. “I can’t be stuck in this bed the whole time.”

“Iza,” his features went serious again. “You need to be in the bed for at least a few days. The droid was pretty adamant about keeping you off your feet and unstimulated.”

“ _Unstimulated?_ ”

“Er—I guess it means you’re not supposed to do a lot? I don’t know. It said to keep you away from datapad screens and not to let you do anything strenuous.” Shrugging, the younger Jedi offered another tight smile. “After the first day or two I can let you take walks or something, but I can’t let you do anything that might exhaust your mind. That includes using the Force.”

“I can’t use the Force?” That was a horrifying concept. It was terrifying enough that she was already having trouble _feeling_ it around her; the idea that she wouldn’t be able to utilize it for Maker knew how long just unnerved her. As panic started settling into her chest again, she brought her eyes back up to his and pressed her lips together tightly. “Are you _sure_ you can’t call Master Kenobi or someone back at the Temple? I don’t… Anakin… I don’t want to be trapped out here _defenseless_.”

“You need to calm down,” his voice was soft when he said it, but Iza could tell that he was trying not to scold her. After a moment, he slowly shook his head. “The communication line is out. I tried after you went to sleep.”

The panic got worse. She could feel her face starting to screw and flinched when a hand settled on her knee. Staring at him, Iza brushed him off and curled in closer towards the wall.

“Don’t touch me,” she crossed her arms over her the tops of her knees and tucked herself into the corner, staring at the wall. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to get so worked up when there was something wrong with her head, but how was she supposed to react? The fact that they were stuck out here with no communication line, barely enough food for two people to last a week, and no idea where _out here_ was—topped off with the fact that she wouldn’t be allowed to use the Force while she healed up? Yeah, she wouldn’t have been able to stop herself from panicking if she _wanted_ to.

“You have to calm down,”

“I don’t _have_ to do anything.” She huffed back, not looking at him.

“Iza,” he scooted closer on the bed like that was going to get her to look at him. “I don’t want you to get worse. I can’t take care of you _and_ fix the starship at the same time.”

“So _don’t_.” Iza was pretty sure the look she gave him was on the mean side. She didn’t care. “Focus on getting us out of here. I can take care of myself.”

He stared at her, a funny look on his face. Iza wished her senses weren’t so damn scrambled. It would be nice to know what he was feeling in that moment. He shook his head lightly and she was almost sure he was going to get up and leave. When he didn’t, she rolled her eyes and went back to staring at the wall.

“I’ll come back in a few hours.”

“ _Don’t_.”

“I’ll try not to scare you again.”

“I said—”

“Iza,” his tone shifted to something firmer and far more serious. It wasn’t enough to make her look at him, but Iza would _maybe_ think twice about arguing with him again. “I know you and I don’t really _get along_ most of the time, but you need to cooperate with me right now. If this were something simple like a broken arm that could be taken care of in a day, I’d leave you alone. _But it’s not._ I can’t even use the Force to help you with this. I don’t know how. So… you need to listen to me and let me help you in the ways that I can.”

Iza worked her jaw, hating him in that moment more than she’d ever hated him in her life. She didn’t want to have to rely on Anakin for anything. She’d been upset enough as it was when they’d hit the dirt and she’d realized that he’d be the only way off this planet. _Now_ she was supposed to sit back and let him take care of her? _Stars above_. What had she done to deserve such a punishment? When she got back to Coruscant, she would be sure to take as many assignments with the youngling clans as possible. Maybe that would do something to atone for whatever sin the Force thought she’d committed.

“You can sit there and be as mad as you want,” _Damn him for still having his Force abilities_. “As long as you’re compliant, I don’t care.”

“ _Fine_.” She bit out, still refusing to look at him.

“ _Thank you_.” He sounded somewhat relieved and Iza could see him running his fingers through his hair out of the corner of her eye. There was another long stretch of silence after that before he heaved a sigh and moved to get to his feet. “I’ll let you go back to sleep.”

“Where’s my lightsaber?”

“What? Oh—” going to his belt, Anakin unclipped the extra one hanging beside his and set it on the table next to the bed. “It was under the console. Must’ve fallen off during the crash.”

“Thank you.” As long as she knew where it was, Iza didn’t need it on her person. She hated sleeping with it on anyway. Getting a quick nod in response, she watched as Anakin headed out of the room and turned the lights out behind him. He kept the door open, which was weird. Iza wouldn’t question it. Instead, she shifted around on the bed to settle back down, finding that she couldn’t quite go back to sleep. She was tired, but her head hurt and there was a strange fuzziness to everything that made her wonder if this was how _regular_ people felt. Could they tell that the Force was around them but were so closed off to it that they just felt the occasional brush of static in their heads and wondered what it might be? It was such a strange concept to her to be born a Non-Sensitive. The Force had been with her for her entire life. Not having it with her now _scared_ her. She wished she could talk to Master Windu. He wasn’t much of a source for comfort, but he knew how to ease her anxieties when it was necessary.

She couldn’t even meditate. She wasn’t allowed to read. She just had to lay here in the dark and hope that she fell asleep normally. It wasn’t fair. If she hadn’t agreed to take this stupid lesson, she wouldn’t have ended up in this situation. But Iza couldn’t blame it on Anakin. As much as she wanted to, she only had herself to blame and she knew it. After the third or fourth attempt at closing her eyes only to have them snap back open five minutes later, Iza huffed out a frustrated breath and kicked a foot against the bed. She knew she wasn’t supposed to get worked up but she couldn’t help it. The tears came uncontrollably and she sucked down a sob without meaning to. Covering her face to muffle any other sounds that might follow, she turned onto her stomach and pressed her face into the pillow. Somewhere beyond the sound of her hushed whimpering, she heard the light _tup_ of boots on the starship floor and felt the bed dip again. Jerking at the feel of a hand on her back, she weakly started to raise a hand as if to push Anakin away and just gave up. She didn’t _care_ if he thought he could comfort her. _He couldn’t_. Nothing short of being taken off of this stupid planet would bring any kind of comfort to her.

But she couldn’t deny that it was getting easier to breathe when he began moving his palm in slow passes between her shoulders. And _maybe_ having another person in the room made it easier to deal with the loss of sensation in her connection to the Force. As the tears began to slow and the sobs became nothing but light, shivery breaths, Iza felt herself starting to relax. _Tired_. She was tired. Her head didn’t hurt as much anymore. Still, Anakin’s hand made steady passes against her back that soothed her and seemed to lull her towards the sleep that had tried to evade her. When she had slipped into the twilight haze of near-unconsciousness, she felt him lift his hand away and felt the blanket being draped over her shoulders. He didn’t say anything, but he brushed his fingers through her hair. It was the last bit of touch she needed in order to slide completely into sleep.

~*~*~*~

Iza was groggy as hell when she woke the next afternoon to the heavy smell of cigarettes and the sensation of hunger deep in her belly. As promised, Anakin had roused her every couple of hours as carefully as he could to check on her while she slept and it’d left her feeling drained. Each time, he’d stayed with her until she’d fallen back to sleep—which she supposed was nice of him to do. As she shifted to get up from the bed, she felt the room give a steady lurch and she let out a soft groan when her vision spun right along with it. A quiet curse was heard from the other room, followed by the clang of something metal, and then Anakin was coming in through the doorway. He brought the smell of cigarettes with him and it took her a moment to focus long enough to realize he had one parked between his lips. He seemed to realize that he’d forgotten to put it out and quickly moved to do so, stubbing it out on the surface of the table before he sat down on the bed.

“You really shouldn’t get up,” he reached like he intended to brace them on her shoulders and Iza shot him a look.

“I’m hungry,” reaching up to push the hair out of her face, she added, “And I need the refresher.”

He sighed.

“Fair enough.” Getting to his feet again, he held his hands out. Iza just stared at them. When she didn’t take them, he curled his fingers lightly to beckon her and got a blank stare in return. “Iza, let me help you.”

“You’re not taking me into the refresher.”

“At least let me _walk_ you there.” He jerked his head toward the doorway. “It’s on the other side of the starship. You won’t make it by yourself.”

“My legs aren’t _broken_ , Anakin,”

“Okay,” he took a step back and waved his hand. “Stand up, then.”

Iza stared up at him for a long time before she scooted to the edge of the bed and slid her legs over the side. Taking a deep breath, she pushed up to stand and gave him a look when her legs did a fine job of keeping her upright. She almost stuck her tongue out at him when she took a step forward to leave, only to have the floor pitch and swirl the way it had the day before and send her stumbling into him. _Damn_. Had he felt this jacked yesterday? She couldn’t remember much more than his arms. She’d been a little jumbled. Determined not to let him be proven right, Iza straightened herself again and tried to take another step, only to wobble in the opposite direction. Anakin caught her by her robes this time, letting out an impatient sigh as he righted her and slid an arm around her waist.

“You’re ridiculous,” he muttered, helping her to walk out of the room. Iza almost pulled out of his grasp to try and walk on her own again, but his grip was solid. He wasn’t going to let go unless he thought he was hurting her. So she grumbled at him instead, glaring down at the floor as they walked. Beside her, she heard him tut and knew he had to be rolling his eyes. “I _swear_ , Iza.”

“Be quiet,” she snapped back, going for the door once they’d reached the refresher. “Go somewhere else. I’ll knock on the door when I need you again.”

“Fine.” Putting his hands up when he released her again, Anakin shook his head and stepped away to let her do her business. Once inside, Iza locked the door and leaned against it, letting out a harsh breath. This was certainly not ideal. It was just her luck that she was still so out of it that she couldn’t even take the short trip to relieve herself without help. _How stupid_. Her head hurt again. She would have to see if there were any pain relievers on board. She certainly hoped so. Also food. She would choke down protein cubes or something if they had them. They were preferable over the often dry and bland meal bars that the ration packs provided. _Ugh_ and if she had to eat a _ration stick_ —no thanks. She’d starve. While she knew she couldn’t really afford to be picky at a time like this, Iza still knew what she could and couldn’t stomach and those gunky cylinders were not appealing in the slightest.

It took a minute before she could stand and wash her hands, giving herself a look in the mirror above the tiny sink. She wished she hadn’t. Her hair was a mess—it typically was in the mornings—and her face was mottled with bruises. No wonder Anakin was worried about her. Deciding not to sit and stare, she ran her hands under the tap and gave the door a light kick, unlocking it and getting it open to poke her head out. He had taken up post on the other side of the corridor, arms folded over his chest while he appeared to be lost in thought. He hadn’t heard her, apparently, but he saw the door open and picked his head up as though coming back to reality.

“Do you want to go back to bed or sit up front with me?”

“I thought I wasn’t supposed to be _stimulated?_ ”

Iza didn’t know why his face had gone pink. It was just a simple question. He’d been the one that said the medic droid didn’t want her doing certain things and she figured that being up front where she could engage in conversation with him _might_ count as one of those things. She had no idea what had gone through _his_ head. She was really starting to hate being cut off from the Force like this.

“I don’t… I think it’s okay if you talk.” He rubbed the back of his head and wouldn’t look at her directly. “I thought maybe it would be better than leaving you alone in the room, is all.”

 _Okay,_ that was thoughtful of him. Anakin wasn’t an _asshole_ or anything, but he could be just as snappy as she was sometimes. There was a reason the two of them clashed a lot. Her master also didn’t like her hanging around him often if she could help it. She was sure that the only reason she’d been able to take this little _flying lesson_ was because she was a _Knight_ and didn’t have to take such silly orders from her master anymore. Maybe she should’ve thought twice about it.

“It might be nicer to see sunlight,” she murmured finally, glancing down the corridor towards the front of the starship. “But I’d like to eat something first.”

“Sure,” waving a hand, Anakin stepped forward to slide his arm around her waist again and guide her back to the room. Carefully lowering her onto the edge of the bed, he waited to make sure she was stable enough to remain sitting up before going to the crate of rations. “Do you have a preference for anything? I’ve kind of started in on the jerky packs but I’ve saved half of them for you.”

“Protein cubes?” She knew her expression was hopeful, but she didn’t care. Those were what she’d take from the crates during extended trips with her master and they were just about the only thing she could stomach. The jerky was tempting, but Anakin could have it. Getting a raised brow from him before he turned and sifted through the crate, Iza—once again—found herself wondering what he was feeling. Reaching into the Force produced a sensation of heavy static and a round of nauseating dizziness that had her teetering enough to the side that she had to grip the edge of the bed.

“ _Whoa_ —” he was up and over to her in a matter of nanoseconds, collecting her close to his chest to steady her before his hands came up to cradle the sides of her head. “Iza?”

She didn’t know where she was anymore. Her head was _pounding_. She was going to throw up. Something smelled like cigarettes. Why couldn’t she reach into the Force? Why couldn’t she feel the signature of whoever was holding her face? Her eyes darted around when they opened and she let out a startled sound, putting her hands out in front of her to rest them on the warm chest of the person in front of her. Her vision was blurry, but she hadn’t gone blind. A few hard blinks seemed to clear it but not before the frightened tears started pooling in them. Her fingers tightened in something that felt like leather and she gave a frantic tug, eliciting a low grunt from the wearer.

“ _Iza_ ,”

She shifted her gaze forward and stared into crystalline blue eyes that were filled with such concern that it confused her. Why would Anakin Skywalker look at her this way? Of every Jedi she knew, he ought to be the least concerned for her. The soft sweep of a thumb against her cheek drew her out of her daze and she shut her eyes again, trying to shake off the sick feeling in her stomach.

“Anakin,” she remembered now. She wasn’t supposed to reach into the Force. _What an idiot she was_. “My head hurts.”

“ ** _Force_** , Iza,” he breathed, sounding beyond relieved. “You scared the _hell_ out of me.”

She’d scared the hell out of _herself_. She could still feel the tears drying on her face and her fingers were shaking as they clutched his tabard. She ought to let him go.

“Are you okay?” He was still touching her face, _still_ looking at her with deep concern. Nodding slowly, Iza let her fingers fall away from his tabard and set them in her lap.

“I shouldn’t have done that,” she mumbled, fiddling with her fingers.

“I… it’s fine, Iza.” He let out a light laugh and gave her a look. “You were—”

“I shouldn’t have tried to reach into the Force.” She wouldn’t look at him. She didn’t want to see his features change. She knew he’d be mad if she looked up. She’d felt the tiny twitch of his fingertips against the sides of her head like he’d realized what sort of idiot mistake she’d made and he was trying _not_ to get angry. After a few beats, he heaved a sigh.

“No, you shouldn’t have.” He shook his head and gently stroked his thumb against her cheek again. “But it’s instinct for us. Just… try to be mindful, Iza.”

She nodded, squeezing her eyes shut against a throb of pain near the back of her skull. Blowing out a soft rush of breath, Iza started to lift her hands with the intention of grasping the sides of her head, but Anakin’s hands were in the way. She could almost picture the alarmed look on his face and the way he’d probably tilted his head like a curious dog. His hands moved, shifting to cradle the back of her head while his thumbs pressed lightly against her temples. She very nearly swatted him away until the gentle sensation of warmth seemed to seep in through her scalp. She whined at him quietly as the pain began to ease away, leaving behind the light nausea and the swimming sensation in her head. She could handle these things. The pain was so excruciating though. When it had all drained out of her, she opened her eyes and found him watching her closely.

“Thank you,” Iza whispered, feeling almost mournful when he let his hands fall away from her head. Anakin gave an easy, soft smile and shrugged.

“You don’t have to thank me.” He looked tired now that she was able to see and think a bit more clearly. She wondered if he’d slept at all. “We should get some food into you and then I think you should rest.”

“But I thought I was going to sit up front with you?”

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Iza,” he looked regretful as he said it, his smile tight. “Maybe if you feel better later you can sit up there with me.”

“You have to sleep too.”

He laughed, looking away and combing his fingers through his hair. Sucking a breath in through his teeth, he gave a quick glance at her from the corner of his eyes and flashed a quick grin.

“I’ll sleep eventually.”

“Anakin,” that didn’t seem fair. He couldn’t spend _all_ of his time worrying about her and getting the starship fixed. He needed to rest at some point. Surely he could take a break from _one_ of these things for a little while? He didn’t answer her. He just gave her knee a little pat and got to his feet to go back to the rations crate, rooting through it again. When he produced the familiar silver package of protein cubes and a bottle of water, Iza considered refusing it until he agreed to sleep. The problem with this was the fact that he could still _very much_ feel her stubbornness through the Force while she was left absolutely numb to his emotional shifts. So when he came back over and sat beside her on the bed to hand the food over, she should have expected him to push it into her hands despite her not reaching for it.

“Don’t try bargaining with me,” he said firmly, shifting to scoot back on the mattress and lean against the wall. “I am not my master. It doesn’t work.”

“It doesn’t work with Master Obi-Wan, either,” she turned and frowned at him. She had only been on a few assignments with the older Jedi during her training years and the man was ten times as stubborn as she was. Trying to get him to do _anything_ good for him was a joke.

“It does for the right price,” Anakin gave her a look and nodded at the food in her hands. “ _Eat_.”

“What if I don’t?”

“Iza,” he scrubbed his hands over his face and tried not to look impatient. “It won’t get me to sleep. It will make me worry even more. Because then I have to worry that you’re in pain and suffering from a concussion _and_ starving.”

Fine. Point taken.

“Well I don’t think it’s fair,” _Yes_ , she would pout while she got the stupid packet of gel-cubes open. “You can worry about me but I can’t worry that you’re not sleeping?”

“I’m not the injured one,”

“You were thrown around just as much as I was,” taking two of the cubes, Iza shoved them into her mouth and chewed, glaring at him. When she’d gotten them down, she huffed. “Even if you didn’t sustain any severe injuries, you still need sleep to heal from that, Anakin.”

“I took a nap.” He turned a hand up and shrugged. “I’m fine.”

“Please?” She didn’t know why this bothered her so much. Maybe because she knew he’d be useless if he didn’t get enough sleep. Maybe, even, because he was doing way too much for her and she felt guilty like she didn’t deserve it. Injured or not, he had other priorities and didn’t need to drop everything just because she felt a little ill or because her headache had come back. Watching as he lifted his head away from the wall to look at her, she found his expression unreadable. She wouldn’t make the mistake of reaching into the Force this time. A minute passed and he cussed quietly before looking elsewhere in the room.

“ _All right_.”

He really was _nothing_ like his master. Pleading with Obi-Wan often got her sad smiles and nothing more. That look Anakin had given her had been somewhat startling, even if she wasn’t entirely sure how to decipher it.

“You can take the bed,” already Iza was starting to scoot closer to the edge, fully intending to lower herself to the floor. A hand in the back of her robes halted her and she twisted to find him giving her another strange look. “What?”

“I’m not taking the bed. I’ll sleep up front.”

“How do I know you’ll actually be sleeping?”

Anakin looked as though he was trying _very_ hard not to smile. He even brought his free hand up to his mouth in an effort to hide the faint smirk that had started to form, but he couldn’t keep the sparkle out of his eyes. Iza didn’t know what was so damn funny about it. She was genuinely concerned that he was just agreeing to shut her up. It seemed like something he might do, after all. When he didn’t say anything after a few moments, she tugged against his hold like she was going to put herself on the floor and gasped when he hauled her back.

“Where do you think _you’re_ going to sleep?” He asked, eyeing her. Raising an eyebrow, Iza gestured to the spot on the floor.

“Right there.”

“I don’t think so.” He looked so damn amused when the situation really wasn’t funny at all. She almost wanted to hit him. Instead, she threw one of the protein cubes at him. It hit him in the chin and fell into his lap, completely erasing the amusement from his features and replacing it with shock. “What was _that_ for?”

“You’re annoying.” Iza huffed and shoved one of the cubes into her mouth, looking away from him.

“How… what…?”

“I’m trying to be nice and you won’t let me. _You’re annoying_.”

“Iza,” Anakin let out a humorless laugh and tilted his head to try and get her to look at him. “Sweetness, you have a _concussion_. You can’t be sleeping on the floor.”

“What did you just call me?” Forget about the sleeping arrangement. Iza had almost choked on her food when the strange pet name had come out of his mouth. Anakin looked like he didn’t know what she was talking about for a moment, seemingly going over what he’d said before his face went a bit pink and his features shifted.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, looking at the toes of his boots. “I guess it slipped out.”

She stared at him for another minute or two before closing the packet of protein cubes. She went for the water bottle, cracked it open, drank down about half of it before she capped that and then crawled to the head of the bed. Iza didn’t say a single damn word as she settled down with her legs curled up just enough to give him room where he sat. The blanket wasn’t really necessary, but she pulled it over her shoulders anyway. When the silence became unbearable, Anakin started to get up from his spot.

“You said you were going to sleep.” Iza muttered, twisting her head to look at him. He paused and eyed her, slowly settling back against the wall.

“…here?”

“You can lie down if you want. There’s room.” She nodded to the space behind her and shrugged. It wasn’t a ton of room, but he’d be fine if he settled on his side. It was better than the floor.

“I… all right.” He hesitated a moment, and then— “Let me get my boots off.”

Iza just grunted at him and settled her head back on the pillow. She felt him shifting around, heard the heavy clomp of his boots hitting the floor. And then he was slowly moving up alongside her. There was a moment where she could feel him hesitating like he was trying to make a decision, but before she could ask what it was, he turned over onto his side and she felt his back press into hers as he took up headspace on the pillow.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, sounding almost uncomfortable.

“It’s all right.” Iza twisted again and offered the blanket, which he declined with a faint smirk and a shake of his head. They both exchanged a look before settling back down in silence. Strange as it was, Iza felt a bit more comfortable having him behind her in the bed. Perhaps it was just the comfort of being able to actually feel his presence instead of being so numb to everything around her that provided the sense of security she needed, but it made it a lot easier to fall asleep. Even though she could feel the tension in his shoulders as they rested against hers, there was just something about the warmth in his presence that felt soothing. As she drifted, she hoped he would relax too. He deserved to get some rest for all that he’d done for her.

~*~*~*~

The bed was empty.

That was the first thing that ran through Iza’s head when she awoke to pitch blackness later on that night. Anakin was no longer beside her and judging by how cool the spot he’d left behind was, he hadn’t been there for a while. Frowning in the dark, Iza flipped the blanket back and scooted to the edge of the bed. Tentatively, she touched her feet to the floor and got up. She didn’t wobble half as much as before when she took an experimental step and even managed to get herself to the doorway before a sense of exhaustion washed over her. _Force_ , she hoped this would go away soon. She was getting very tired of feeling _tired_. Peering out into the corridor towards the cockpit, she found it completely empty. Confusion settled in as she used the wall to guide herself up to the front. Where had Anakin gone? Had he managed to get in touch with the Temple and forgotten to wake her? _What was that sound?_ The closer she got to the cockpit, she realized that it was raining. It pounded against the transparisteel in sheets and made it difficult to see through.

_Where was Anakin?_

Grasping the back of the co-pilot’s chair to keep herself steady, Iza looked around. There were tools strewn about the floor. He’d clearly been working here at some point. She couldn’t sense him. She wanted to reach into the Force, but didn’t want to risk another weird spell. Her nails dug noisily into the upholstery as her breathing picked up, that sick sense of panic having returned. He wouldn’t leave without her, would he? They didn’t always get along but surely he wouldn’t—

“What are you doing out of bed?”

Iza screamed and dropped where she stood, covering her face to hide the way she’d burst into terrified tears. The wet slap of bare feet coming up behind her was her only warning before she was lifted—spun—and settled down on a _very_ wet lap.

“ _Force_ , Iza,” Anakin carefully cradled her head against his chest and gave a reassuring squeeze around her shoulders. “I’m so sorry.”

“Where did you _go?!_ ” And why was he wet? _Where the hell was his shirt?_

“I was taking advantage of the rain,” tilting his head to look at her, he brushed the hair away from her face and tried to pry her hands away. “Iza,”

“ _You **left**!_” Her hand struck his shoulder and left behind a light pink welt on his damp skin that steadily got darker the longer she glared at him. “You just _left!_ ”

He blinked at her in surprise before shaking his head, little droplets of water falling from the ends of his hair.

“I was going to come back.”

“You didn’t wake me up!”

“I don’t need to do that anymore,” he fixed her with a funny look and tipped his head. “Iza, I’m not going to just leave you. You know that, right?”

Iza made a face that suggested that _no_ —she did _not_ know that. At the very least, she was on the fence about it.

“ _Iza_ ,” Anakin frowned hard and knit his brows together. “Come on. I think we’ve known each other long enough to have more trust in each other than that.” When she still didn’t look convinced, he added, “Would I go through all the trouble of making sure you’re okay if I planned to leave you behind?”

 _All right_. That was a fair argument. But it still didn’t change the fact that he’d scared the life out of her by leaving her to wake up alone. He knew good and well that she was cut off from her use of the Force. He should have taken it into consideration before running off to go play in the rain—or whatever it was he’d done.

“You still look like you don’t believe me.”

“I can’t _feel_ your intentions.” She reminded him, not bothering to hide the bitter pout in her tone. “It’s hard to trust someone when you can’t tell if they’re lying to you or not.”

“What reason would I have to lie to you, Iza?”

“I don’t know!” The brunette hated every bit of this. She just wanted her connection back. She wanted to stop feeling so damn vulnerable to everything. She wanted to feel like _herself_ and not whatever weepy monster had crept into her skin and replaced her. That damn headache was starting to come back too and she was doing her best not to show it as she lowered her gaze to the floor.

“I promise that I’m not lying to you,” skimming his hand along her back, the younger Jedi sighed quietly. “I would have taken you with me even if you were still asleep. I’m not going to leave you behind, Iza.”

She knew she needed to believe him. Anakin hadn’t done _anything_ to betray her trust since they’d gotten here. He’d never really done much to betray her trust in general, honestly. Their bickering was often caused by stupid things—nothing inherently significant. He had not meant to scare her and she _knew_ that. She was just going to have to trust him without using the Force to do so. It seemed she was going to have to do a _lot_ without the assistance of the Force.

“It scared me,” she murmured finally, feeling the exhaustion beginning to creep up on her again. How long was this going to last? She had to make a note to have him bring the droid out again to answer a few questions. “You were just _gone_.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” sinking back into the chair, he ran his fingers through the soaked strands of his hair and eyed her. “I didn’t think you’d wake up so soon.”

“Will you wake me up next time?” Iza tried to pretend she wasn’t watching the little droplets of water as they fell from the ends of his hair onto his shoulder. The welt she’d left was even darker now. She ought to apologize for that.

“Yeah,” he nodded and rubbed lightly at his top lip. He’d spent far too much time in Obi-Wan’s company. “If I intend to leave the ship, I’ll do that.”

“What were you even doing?” Gesturing towards the transparisteel, Iza made a face. “It’s _pouring._ ”

“I told you—I was taking advantage of it. I barely got the soap off me before I realized you were moving around in here.”

Her face went almost unbearably hot and she didn’t know why. She’d thought that maybe he’d just gone for a walk to enjoy the rain. That was something _she_ would have done if she were allowed. She hadn’t pictured him using the rain to bathe in— _but now she was_. Mumbling some sort of half-hearted response, the brunette nodded and went back to staring at the welt on his shoulder. Vaguely, she realized that the seat of her trousers was soaked through from sitting on his lap now. That was fantastic. She’d have to walk around like this until they were dry. _Awesome_.

“You can’t go outside.” His amused tone drew her attention and she stared at him strangely for a long moment, tilting her head.

“What?”

“I know you probably want to wash off, too.” Well, at least he didn’t seem to have noticed her face changing colors. “But I can’t let you do that yet. Besides—you don’t smoke. My hair starts carrying the smell if I don’t wash it.”

“You don’t smell.” Shrugging, Iza made a face. “I slept right next to you and didn’t smell anything.”

“ _I_ can smell it,” he looked even more amused than before. “It’s a personal thing. But thank you, all the same.”

Iza sat there looking at him like an idiot for another minute or two before finding enough sense to turn her gaze elsewhere. The headache wasn’t as severe as before. Just an irritating, dull throb that seemed to make the exhaustion worse. Really, walking around the ship had been a stupid idea. It probably wasn’t great that he’d scared the life out of her, either. As she sagged into his chest and rested her cheek against his shoulder, Iza wondered again when she’d go back to normal. It would be nice to not be filled with fog and fatigue. The quiet chuckle rumbling in Anakin’s throat shook her from her thoughts and had her slowly lifting her gaze up to meet his. His expression was still _very_ amused, but there was a softness to his eyes that hadn’t been there before. The hand he’d been smoothing along her back was now lightly parked near the dip in her waist and she could feel the length of his arm cradling her spine to support her. She didn’t know what was so damn interesting for him to stare like that. She was tired. He’d propped her here. He very likely would have gotten mad if she tried to walk herself down to the sleeping quarters again.

“I should put you back to bed,” he said softly, though he made no moves to get up. Iza almost objected for the sake of being stubborn. _She_ wanted to decide when she rested and when she didn’t. Her body, however, was not on board with this plan. Grunting lightly, she shut her eyes for what felt like half of a second and opened them again when she felt herself being jostled and lifted from her place on his lap.

“Anakin?”

“It’s all right,” he sounded like he hated having to move her around so much. She wondered if it was because she was too heavy. “Do me a favor and put your arms around my neck.”

Iza was too tired to object. After taking a minute for the quiet request to sink in, she reached up and slid her arms up around his neck. He readjusted her in his arms and lifted her up higher before carrying her off towards the back of the starship. She’d very nearly dozed off again when he’d started lowering her onto the bed, startling her and causing her to grasp at his shoulders in alarm.

“Hey,” Anakin sat down on the bed and smiled reassuringly in the dim light pouring in from the doorway. “It’s okay, sweetness.”

“Stay?” She wasn’t going to bother saying anything about that weird pet name again. Anakin’s brows went up in surprise and he let out a little laugh.

“I’m… kind of… wet.”

“I can’t fall asleep by myself.” She didn’t care. The bed would dry eventually. Iza just didn’t want to get stuck hovering in that weird fogginess between sleep and consciousness again. The contemplative look in his eyes made her worry that he might object for a moment but slowly, Anakin started to nod.

“Okay,” nudging her off of his lap, he waited for her to get settled before crawling in on the other side of her. Once again, he was torn between which side he ought to rest on. Iza made the decision for him when she grasped one of his hands and pulled his arm over her shoulders. _All right_. Waiting while he got as comfortable as he could behind her, Iza drifted in and out, nearly fully asleep by the time he’d nestled his chest to her back and gotten the blanket pulled up over the two of them. She thought she heard him say something, but wasn’t quite sure.

It was _much_ easier to fall asleep this time around.


	2. I Care If I Hurt You

The next few days or so passed with little fuss. But by the fourth day, Iza was growing bored with just lying around in the bed all the time. She’d had so many damn naps that she was sure she wouldn’t need to sleep again for at least a month, but Anakin was still hesitant about letting her get up and walk around. He’d allowed her to come and sit with him up in the cockpit while he worked for one afternoon, but when she’d had one of her headache fits he’d ordered her straight back into bed. She hated it. She hated it a lot. And she wasn’t shy about letting him know she hated it, either.

“You need to get back into bed,” Anakin had nearly cracked his skull sitting up so fast beneath the console. Iza had tried to sneak past him to head outside and seemed to have forgotten that _his_ Force senses were working just fine. Pivoting on a heel, she pouted and gave a childish stomp of her foot.

“ _I’m **bored** ,_ Anakin!”

“I know you are, sweetness,” he’d gotten real comfortable using that pet name too. In all fairness, Iza hadn’t really stopped him after a while. It seemed moot to bother. “But I can’t just let you go wandering around out there. It’s not safe.”

“Can you give me something to _read_ , then?”

“No datapads. Not for a few more days. _Especially_ not when you’re still getting headaches.” Wiping his hands off on his trousers, the younger Jedi got to his feet and started over to her, watching her lean up against the side of the starship. Tutting softly, he glanced out of the transparisteel to see how much light they had left and heaved a sigh. “Do you want me to take you for a walk?”

“I was hoping to find somewhere to _bathe_.” Iza wouldn’t look at him as she crossed her arms over her chest and pointed her eyes to the floor. She hadn’t been able to take advantage of the rain storms the same way he had and now that they’d passed, she felt she’d missed her chance. But there _had_ to be a body of water somewhere nearby, right? There was no way the place could be this lush without one. She didn’t need the Force to know that he was hesitating now. It was clear in the way he held himself with his back half slumped forward, yet completely stiff at the same time, and how he kept rubbing at the back of his neck like he was either trying to think of a solution or trying _not_ to think of something entirely. She heard him heave a sigh and saw the shadow of his hand when he threw it out to one side.

“I can take you to the river,” he sounded like he wasn’t completely on board with the idea at all. “The water’s a little fast, but it isn’t very deep.”

“I’ll be fine on my own.”

“ _No_ —you won’t.”

Picking her head up, the brunette frowned at him. She was starting to really hate that concerned look of his. As sweet as it was that he was taking care of her, Iza wondered if he was ever going to let her start taking care of herself again.

“I think I can bathe myself, Anakin.”

“I’m not offering to help,” he let out a laugh that suggested he was startled by the statement. “But you’re not going alone.”

“I don’t need you _watching_ me either.” Iza tightened her arms over her chest and leaned further back against the wall of the starship, really not liking the way her face was starting to heat. _Honestly_. Wasn’t he getting enough out of this? He’d been sleeping beside her— _cuddling_ with her, even—and she’d allowed him to use that stupid pet name he’d given her. Did he really need to watch her wash up? That felt like it was pushing it a little.

“Wasn’t planning on watching either, sweetness,” the amused smile didn’t quite seem so genuine. She couldn’t tell if he was lying or uncomfortable. “You just can’t go alone.”

“You don’t trust me to do _anything_ by myself. You’re treating me like a youngling and I don’t care for it, Anakin.”

He stared at her for a long time without saying anything and had she not wanted a repeat of what had happened a few days prior, Iza might’ve attempted to reach into the Force to see what he might be feeling. She hadn’t tried doing it since and she’d noticed that some of the static seemed to have slowly started to lift. She still couldn’t sense damn near anything, but there were tiny things that sometimes flickered across her radar that she recognized. Right now, it was like trying to feel through a concrete wall with nothing but her bare fingers. His gaze shifted slightly— _searching_ —and his lips tightened as he worked his jaw. Exhaling sharply through his nose, Anakin shook his head.

“No.” He said flatly. “I can’t let you go by yourself, Iza. It has nothing to do with trusting you. I don’t trust your _head_.”

“Forget it,” pushing away from the wall, Iza turned to head back towards the sleeping quarters. There was no use in trying to get out of here if she wasn’t going to be allowed to do it alone. The only place she seemed to be _allowed_ to be alone was the stupid bed and even then she had to share it at certain points of the day. The door to the room had to be open all the time, too. She had no privacy. So— _scratch that_. The only place on the whole dumb ship she was truly allowed to be alone was the damn refresher. It was annoying.

“Iza,” of course he was going to follow after her. _Of course_. “Don’t do this.”

“Leave me _alone_ , Anakin,” she tried to push the button to shut the door and found it stuck in place. _Oh_. So that’s why it wouldn’t close. **Great**. She supposed that was _her_ fault since she’d crashed the bird so hard. Giving him a quick, irritated look she continued on and dropped onto the bed with a grunt. That probably wasn’t a good idea. The droid had said she needed to avoid jostling herself as much as possible. As she tried to get settled, she started wondering what the hell she’d do to pass the time in here _now_. Maybe she could count the rivets in the wall again. There were two hundred and forty three in the one left to the bed alone. Some of them seemed to be missing. Or maybe she could sit and twirl her lightsaber a hundred times until her knuckles and wrist went numb. That was always fun.

“Iza,”

“Do you know what _alone_ means?” Or maybe she could sit here and plan fifty different ways to smother him in his sleep. That was something she hadn’t done yet.

“I don’t know what you want me to do, sweetness,” he stood at the foot of the bed, arms folded and that stupid unreadable look on his face. “It’s unsafe for you to go by yourself. You still have a hard time getting around the starship. I don’t know why you think I’d just let you crawl around the jungle.”

“Because you’re tired of looking at my face, maybe?” She knew she was sick of looking at his all the time. Five days and he still hadn’t made much progress on the starship. They were running damn low on food, no matter how much they tried to ration it, and if she was supposed to _get better_ by _staying calm_ , running out of food was not going to help. Iza heard a sharp _tut_ and looked over to find him frowning at her. She didn’t like the look in his eyes.

“What is it you really want, Iza? You want me to leave you in here for a little while? I’ll do that. I’ll go out and see if I can’t find somewhere safer for you to bathe. But you are not going out by yourself.”

She stared at him for a long time. He stared right back. When it was clear that he had no intention of budging no matter what she thought she might try, Iza twisted on the bed and rolled over onto her stomach so she wouldn’t have to look at him anymore. She heard him sigh heavily and cuss and waited for him to sit down on the bed like he often did when she was being stubborn. He didn’t. Instead, she was met with the sound of his boots on the floor as they retreated from the room. They stopped near the doorway and then came right back at a hurried pace.

“You know—” he sounded fed up. She _supposed_ she couldn’t blame him. “—I don’t understand why you act like I’m punishing you, Iza. I just don’t want anything to happen to you. But you _fight_ me so damn hard—and I don’t get it. _I don’t_. I want to _help_ you. I want you to get _better_ , not worse. That isn’t going to happen if you keep acting like this.”

Iza didn’t respond. She didn’t know how to. It made her feel strange just listening to him talk to her like that.

“Okay,” he huffed out a laugh and she could picture him shaking his head. “I get it. I’ll leave you alone, sweetness. But you better stay on this starship and you better not do anything you’re not supposed to. I will break every last datapad I can find if I think you’ve so much as _glanced_ at one. _Behave yourself._ ”

He turned and left again. This time, his footfalls carried him all the way out to the loading ramp and off of the ship. Iza didn’t know how long she waited there to make sure he was really gone before she sat up. It felt weird being truly alone for once. Even weirder that there was something like _guilt_ pooling in her belly over it. He’d sounded so… _hurt?_ Was that the right emotion? Did he even have a right to feel that way? Maybe. She didn’t know. Iza hadn’t been outright _mean_ to him—just stubborn. But he had to understand that she was sick and tired of sitting around and not being allowed to do anything. Surely enough time had passed that she should be allowed to do small things like go outside and walk around the starship? Maybe _crawling around the jungle_ was a bit much, but if she didn’t stray far from the ship then it shouldn’t be a problem? According to Anakin, it was a very big problem. She wondered if he was taking this too seriously. She wasn’t _dying_ , after all. It was a concussion. She would be over it in another week or so, the droid had said. Of course—it had also said that she’d needed rest and peace and to keep to minimal activities. _Peace_ seemed to be the hard part.

Iza wondered if he was mad at her. Anakin had done a pretty good job at staying mild mannered through the whole thing, even if he’d gotten a _little_ frustrated at times. This was the first time he’d sounded truly upset at her for not wanting to comply to the rules. It confused her. It wasn’t as though she was asking to go diving into a pool of water. She wanted to _bathe_. She was starting to become a little self-conscious sleeping beside him after not having had a chance to wash up after so many days. She’d already stopped wearing most of her layers of robes because the humidity made her sweat terribly. Even if he didn’t complain, it was similar to how he felt about the cigarette smoke in his hair. It was a _personal_ thing. At least the cigarette smoke wasn’t offensive—not to her. She’d come to find the smell somewhat pleasant, honestly. When he’d sneak out of the bed in the middle of the night to have one, Iza enjoyed the light smell of it on his breath when he returned. That thought brought a funny feeling to her stomach.

He had been sleeping so close these last few nights and she supposed it was mostly her fault. It was damn difficult to nap during the day if he wasn’t milling around the room and she always seemed to know when he left to go work on the starship. But at night, when he’d slip into the bed behind her and let her settle back against his chest, she slept like a baby. She sometimes woke when he’d get up for his cigarettes or if something outside startled her out of a dream. A few times, she’d woken up to his face tucked in the crook of her neck and his arms wound tight around her. It hadn’t bothered her too terribly. He was asleep and likely didn’t realize what he was doing, after all. Besides, he was warm and his presence was so comforting that it felt almost _mean_ to wake him up. That was another thing that made her stomach feel strange. The feeling seemed to creep up into her chest and tighten it, making it hard to breathe. Iza shut her eyes and tried to shake it off. She didn’t want to think about these things. She needed to take advantage of the solitude while she could. Trouble was, she had no idea what she wanted to do. She wasn’t allowed to read and she wasn’t allowed to meditate. If she set foot off the starship, he’d get even more upset. So—what the hell was she going to do?

Looking around the room, she realized that there were still things scattered all over the floor from the crash. Neither of them had really thought about cleaning. Fussy as she could sometimes be, Iza had no idea how she’d been able to _live_ like this for so long. Well, that settled it. She would just clean up. It wasn’t strenuous and it would keep her busy. Scooting to the edge of the bed, she tried to figure out where to start. The longer she thought about it, the less appealing the idea became. She was tired again. The idea of trying to sleep when Anakin wasn’t on the starship put a tightness in her throat that she didn’t like. She wondered where he was and how far away he was. Drawing her bottom lip between her teeth in thought, she took a breath and shut her eyes before _tentatively_ reaching out into the Force. It worked—at least for a second.

That sensation of heavy static cut her off before she could even get a clear picture of his face moving between greenery, a sharp pain slamming into the back of her head without mercy. She tipped one way, then the other and felt herself floating momentarily before she hit something solid. _Her head **hurt**._ Curling up where she lay, Iza covered her head and tried squeezing her hands against the sides of it. It didn’t help. Her vision was blurry. Her head was too full of fog to make sense of anything. Her body tingled like it was crawling with tiny bugs. Rolling onto her back as she breathed in short, panicked gasps, Iza wondered faintly if this was what it felt like to die. As the edges of her vision darkened to black and sucked her into unconsciousness, she _prayed_ Anakin wouldn’t mourn for her.

He didn’t deserve that kind of pain.

~*~*~*~

 _Warm_. Whatever she was surrounded by was warm and it was breathing. _Alive_. It was alive. _She_ was alive. A soft breath of relief rushed out of her and she turned her face into the warmth, letting out a quiet whimper. Gentle fingers combed through her hair and pulled a startled gasp from her. Tipping her head back as much as she could, Iza lazily opened her eyes to find Anakin staring back down at her. She thought she’d seen his worried face. She was wrong. He looked almost terrified as he stared down at her, silently assessing her with those pretty blue eyes of his. Their closeness suddenly brought back her worries of bathing and Iza shifted to try and push away from him. He wasn’t having it. The arm around her waist was like a duranium bar; firm and unyielding. Whining at him, she tried again and he made some sort of disgruntled noise at her, his eyes darkening slightly as he shook his head.

“Anakin,”

“What _happened?_ ” His voice was rough in a way that Iza had never heard before. There was a thick sense of worry in it, too. Had he been crying? The longer she looked into his eyes, the glassier they looked. She would’ve mistaken it for him just being tired if she didn’t know any better.

“I…” She needed a minute. This was throwing her. Deciding she wasn’t comfortable looking into those sad eyes anymore, Iza decided staring at his chest was a better option. “I just wanted to know where you were.”

“ _Stars above, Iza_.”

“It… I thought…”

“You thought because it had been a few days that you’d just _try it again?_ ” He spoke through gnashed teeth and she knew if she looked up, he’d likely be glaring at her. “ _What did I say before I left?_ ”

“Behave.”

“And what did you do?”

“I didn’t.”

“Do you know what that did to me? _Do you?_ ” He brought a hand up and grasped her chin, startling her a little when he tipped her head up so she’d look at him. “Iza, I thought… _you **promise** me right now you won’t do it again._”

Iza stared. His grip wasn’t too firm, but the look in his eye shook her a bit. After a moment or two, she nodded slowly and blinked a few times, wondering when she’d started crying.

“I promise,” she didn’t want to scare him again. She didn’t want to scare herself like that again, either. Even if she had to wait until after they got back to Coruscant, she wouldn’t try reaching into the Force again. Anakin shut his eyes and exhaled slowly through his nose, leaning down to rest his forehead against hers. Iza could only continue staring at him. She understood why it would be so unsettling for him to witness her going through these things. But she didn’t understand why it seemed to affect him so deeply. Maybe because he had his Force abilities. He was still very sensitive to her emotions and likely could sense her struggling. It had to be rubbing off on him a little. That weird feeling in her stomach was back, stronger now.

“I found somewhere to take you,” he said once he’d leaned back again. “But you cannot go by yourself.”

“Okay,”

“Iza,” he raised an eyebrow and leveled their gazes. “You can’t get in by yourself. Not while you’re like this.”

She felt her face heat and shifted her eyes elsewhere again. _Well_ , she probably should’ve expected that. Maybe she could get in with her underclothes on? It would be like swimming. There was no harm in that, right? She could kill two birds with one stone and clean those too. Squeezing her eyes shut against a quick pinch of pain in her head, Iza felt Anakin shift his arm from around her and cradle her head in his hands. Opening her mouth to protest, he _shushed_ her and sent that light warmth to where it seemed to hurt the most. Absently, she leaned into one of his palms, keeping her eyes shut until he’d finished. _Boy_ , his eyes were pretty, weren’t they?

“You can take me,” she said quietly, watching his brows lift. “Do we have time?”

“We have a little time.” He nodded, mouth pinching in a light frown. “Are you sure?”

“I smell, Anakin.” She looked embarrassed when she said it. “I have to sleep next to you. It’s so warm that it’s only going to get worse. Please?”

Anakin laughed. He looked as though he hadn’t meant to, but it happened anyway and he looked away with a slow shake of his head. Poking his tongue into his cheek, he lowered his eyes and sighed.

“You really don’t,” his shoulders came up in a light shrug. “But I will take you.”

Iza was suddenly faced with the realization that she didn’t know if she could stand. She’d gotten very wobbly the last time she’d had one of these weird attacks and she worried that he’d have to support her the whole way to wherever it was he’d have to take her. Not wanting him to sense this worry, she smiled and nodded in thanks, moving to use his shoulders to get to her feet.

“Hold on,” he stopped her and carefully hoisted himself up onto the edge of the bed first, holding his hands out for her to take instead. “Okay, now try.”

She gave him a funny look before taking his hands to pull herself upright, unsurprised at the light dizziness that followed. She didn’t sway as much as she expected to, but he still rested a restraining hand on her waist to keep her steady until she felt stable enough to take a step or two back. When Anakin seemed satisfied that she was okay on her own, he got up and gestured towards the door. Neither of them spoke as he guided her out, pausing long enough to grab a soap cake from the crate in the corner on the way. Iza waited patiently near the loading ramp while he lowered it and watched him gather his cigarettes and lightsaber before he joined her again. She allowed him to rest his hand on her lower back once they’d gotten outside, but only because she was so busy taking in the sight of everything. It smelled _amazing_ out here. Fresh and green and sweet; she couldn’t stop turning her head to look at all of the different flowers and trees as they started down a makeshift path he’d cut. The sounds of different animals chittering around them made her smile. It was nice to know they weren’t entirely alone here. Even if they didn’t know whether these animals were _friendly_ or not, it was better than having been stranded on a dead planet. When her curious head swiveling made her dizzy enough to teeter slightly to the side, Iza gasped quietly when Anakin practically pinned her to his side.

Looking up, she found him smiling instead of scowling. He seemed to be amused by her amazement of their surroundings. Well, that was better than having him annoyed that she was possibly straining herself. Noting that the soil had suddenly gone softer, Iza turned her attention forward to find that they’d reached an open area where there was a wide pool of water that led up to a high waterfall. She stopped in her tracks as a sense of awe fell over her. She’d never seen anything like it. Coruscant didn’t have places like this. She’d only been to a handful of planets that even had the kind of greenery she was seeing. But she’d _never_ seen such a sight in her life. It was one of those things that was so pretty that it almost hurt to look at it—but in a good way. She suddenly didn’t hate herself so much for crashing here and wondered what other sort of beautiful places the planet held secret from unsuspecting eyes. The feel of Anakin’s hand moving from her lower back to her waist brought her back to attention and she started walking again. Her steps were a bit hurried and she heard him laughing beside her.

“Take it easy, sweetness,” he tried to keep hold of her by the belt but she wasn’t having it. “It isn’t going anywhere.”

“No, but daylight is,” she turned back to look at him pleadingly and got a soft look in return. Iza wondered why he did that. Why did he give her such looks? What did she ever do to deserve them? He seemed to sigh as he shook his head at her.

“ _Okay_ ,” he gestured towards the safer path to the water. “Be _careful_. I’m right behind you.”

Nodding, the brunette turned and headed down the path, loosening her belt as she went. Looking for a good spot to get in, she found one close enough to the waterfall where she could actually look at it, but shallow looking enough where she might be able to stand. Her trousers came off first, and then her tunic. She’d nearly forgotten about keeping her underclothes on until she heard Anakin coming up behind her. Slowly, she edged into the pool, surprised at how cool the water was. For such a tropical planet, she’d expected something a bit warmer.

“Iza, wait for me,”

She heard the jingle of his belt and turned to see him dropping his trousers on top of where she’d set hers. He’d already taken his tunic off. For a moment, she couldn’t keep her eyes off of him. At least until she realized that he was looking right back at her. Her next breath was a strange mix of a gasp and a huff and she looked back towards the waterfall to distract herself until he waded up beside her.

“It gets deep towards the middle so be careful,” Anakin nudged her lightly and handed her the cake of soap, watching as she took it and simply held it for a moment or two. “If you want me to hang back, I will.”

“What?” Her thoughts had been going a thousand miles a second and she hadn’t been able to focus on any of them except for the furious pounding of her heart and why it was beating that way. The younger Jedi gave her a curious look and knit his brows together, studying her face a moment.

“Are you okay?”

“I think so,” she nodded, turning the soap over in her hands. “Why?”

“You have that vacant look again. Maybe this was a bad idea,”

“No,” she shook her head and stepped away, moving further into the water with a quick smile. “I’m fine. I swear.”

He looked as though he didn’t quite believe her but that arguing was the last thing on his mind. Nodding, Anakin stayed where he was and just watched as she waded deeper into the water. Allowing herself to focus on her surroundings again, Iza carefully sank beneath the water to dampen her skin before she started running the soap over it. The longer she focused on the soft sound of the waterfall crashing over the rocks and into the surface of the pool, the easier it was to relax. The movements of her hands as they worked the soap along her body were automatic; arms, shoulders, belly, hips, breasts. She backed out of the water a little to get at her legs and her backside, pausing when she got to her back. She didn’t have the luxury of her little scrubber brush. _Oh well_. She started wading back into the pool to wet her hair when warm fingers curled around hers and took the cake of soap from her. Twisting, she looked back at Anakin curiously and raised an eyebrow. He had that damn look on his face again. He didn’t say anything as he held the soap up and raised an eyebrow. Was he offering to wash her back? Well, she supposed it wouldn’t hurt. At least he was _asking_. Nodding, she gathered her hair back over her shoulder and tilted her head forward.

 ** _Warm_** _._ His hands were so damn warm compared to the water when they slipped up her back and over her shoulders. _Strong_ , too. His thumbs worked little knots free from the base of her neck and his palms rubbed out patches of stiffness from sleeping on the thin mattress. She wasn’t sure he was _washing_ her back as much as he was massaging it, but Iza didn’t mind much. Even when he started bringing up palmfuls of cool water to rinse her skin that shocked her, she didn’t mind. And when he tentatively set his hand on her hip and pulled her back against his chest, she didn’t mind that either. He set his chin on her shoulder to watch the waterfall with her, but he didn’t say anything. That was fine. She didn’t know if she’d be able to say much to him anyway. After a while, she heard him say something about her hair and Iza remembered that she needed to wash that too. Stepping away from him so she could duck herself under and wet it, she turned to take the soap from him when he took it upon himself to go ahead and run his already lathered fingers into the dark waves.

She wished he hadn’t. She wished he wouldn’t look so determined as he did it. She wished her breathing would even out. He was as gentle as ever as he rubbed his fingertips over her scalp and worked the soap through her hair, pausing long enough to gather more suds into his palms to continue down the length of the strands. Iza wanted to say she could’ve done it herself. She could’ve done the whole thing by herself, without his help. She just didn’t have the heart to. He let her rinse it out by herself, at least. And when she was done, he’d pulled her back into his arms like there’d been no interruption at all. Iza took the soap from him, ran the corner of it lightly along one of the forearms he’d draped around her shoulders. From the corner of her eye, she saw him smirking. Dipping the cake beneath the water, she rubbed it between her palms and lathered her hands, smoothing them over his arms while he chuckled at her and shook his head. He didn’t do anything to stop her. And he didn’t do anything to stop her when she turned around and started tentatively rubbing the soap into the skin of his shoulders. _Man_ , he was tall.

She was vaguely aware that he was watching her and felt him brush a lock of wet hair off of her face while she rinsed the soap from his skin. Her eyes hadn’t left his chest yet. She was contemplating whether or not she ought to do that part for him. He would likely stop her if he didn’t want her to, right? _Right_. Once again working her hands into a lather, she hesitated a moment before pressing a palm to the center of his chest and working in slow circles over the surface. She noticed that he’d taken a sharp breath—that his breathing was getting quite _deep_ , actually. It was probably not appropriate for her to go lower than his sternum, so she kept to just his sides and his chest. The soft press of lips to her hairline startled her and she dropped the cake of soap into the water, blinking in surprise. Tilting her head back to look at him questioningly, she got a faint smile in return and another brush of his fingers against her cheek. _Warm_. He made her feel very warm. Warm and _strange_. That odd feeling was in her chest again and it worried her. She’d gotten that feeling just before she’d blacked out. Was it going to happen again? There was a change in his expression the longer he looked at her, like he was wondering if he’d done something wrong. He hadn’t. She was pretty sure he hadn’t. The little kiss was harmless, as far as she was concerned. But when she opened her mouth to say something, a deep _crack_ of thunder sounded overhead and all that came out was a shout of surprise.

Anakin swore at the top of his lungs and looked up. When had the sky gone so black? Grabbing for the cake of soap that floated nearby, he wound his arm around her middle and started dragging her towards the shore.

“We need to get inside,”

He really didn’t need to tell her twice. The flicker of lightning that arced across the sky was bright and seemed to light up the entire jungle an eerie blue color. The second clap of thunder brought a torrent of rain that crashed down on them before they’d even gotten to their discarded clothing and Iza let out a half-panicked, half-overjoyed squeal. She _loved_ these kinds of storms. Dangerous as they could be, they were fun to watch and run around in whenever she had the chance. She doubted that Anakin would allow her the opportunity, but at least she’d get to enjoy some of the rain on the way in. Taking her clothes when they were shoved against her chest, Iza allowed Anakin to keep a tight hold on her as they rushed back down the path to the starship, laughing and occasionally shouting when the thunder roared and the lightning flashed around them.

“ _Get in, get in!_ ” Anakin chuckled as he ushered her up the loading ramp, almost tripping himself in the process. Once inside, he brought he ramp up and grunted when Iza broke free of his grasp to run over to the transparisteel to watch the storm. Kneeling up in one of the chairs, she leaned against the backrest and propped her chin on her arms, flinching lightly when the next clap of thunder startled her. It was beautiful. She loved it.

“You want this?”

Turning her head, she found Anakin standing with his outer robe held out to her. He’d put his trousers back on. They didn’t appear to have gotten very wet.

“Don’t you want it?” Reaching out to take it anyway, she slipped it on over her wet underclothes and pulled her hair out from beneath it. It wouldn’t stay dry for very long. Shaking his head, Anakin propped himself against one of the storage cabinet doors and tapped a cigarette free from its packet. She wondered if he was ever going to run out of them or if he had a supply hidden somewhere. She watched while he got it lit, took a deep drag, then the careful way the smoke streamed from his lips. He didn’t seem to notice her watching at first, but he paused mid-drag when he finally caught her eye.

“Do you want me to go outside?”

“No.” She shook her head, shifting in the seat to settle into it properly and draw her legs up to her chest.

“You know I’m not going to share this with you, right?” He smiled faintly and held the smoldering cigarette up before parking it back between his lips for another quick drag. “Master Windu would have a real reason to kill me.”

“Master Windu doesn’t want to kill you,” she frowned, resting her chin on her knees. “But I wasn’t going to ask you to share, either.”

“Good.” Lowering his eyes to the floor as he flicked the ash from the end, Anakin ran a distracted hand through his hair and fell silent. Both of them jerked when thunder sounded overhead, but only Iza turned to watch the lightning that followed. When she looked back at the younger Jedi, he was eyeing her curiously. “You like thunderstorms?”

She nodded.

“I do. I think they’re soothing.”

“Soothing?” An amused little smile spread across his lips and he pointed towards the transparisteel. “All of that?”

Shrugging, the brunette turned her hands up.

“You think street racing is relaxing. That’s twice as noisy and even deadlier.”

“Point taken.” He smiled wider and moved to put his cigarette out, slipping it back into the packet before tossing said packet down into his toolbox. For a moment, he appeared to contemplate something before pushing away from the cabinet door and heading towards the sleeping quarters. Tilting out of the chair to see what he was doing, Iza righted herself when he came back holding two jerky packets and one of the last bottles of water. They were going to have to hope the water around here was safe enough to drink, soon. When he held a jerky packet out to her, Iza shook her head.

“I ate,”

“No you didn’t.” he fixed her with a look. “I’ve been keeping track of everything in there. You haven’t touched any of it.”

“Just save it, Anakin. Those are the ones _you_ like, anyway.”

“Iza,” his voice took on that stern tone and Iza immediately wished she’d just taken it. She hadn’t meant to ruin the sweet mood that had settled between them. She didn’t want this. “You need to eat.”

“Okay,” holding her hand out for the packet, she wouldn’t look at him. When he didn’t immediately hand it over, she looked back up and found him eyeing her curiously. _Right_. He wasn’t used to her just giving in so easily, was he? He’d probably expected some sort of fight or another act of stubbornness that would likely end with them being grumbly with one another. Well, he wouldn’t get it this time. Giving him a look, Iza gestured for him to hand the packet over and got an even stranger look in return. Heaving a sigh, Iza lowered her arm and crossed it over her chest. _Fine_. If he didn’t want to give it to her now, then he didn’t have to. She didn’t care. She was just trying to be compliant like he wanted her to be so she didn’t have to see that scared, worried look on his face again. Looking up when the packet was slipped into her lap, Iza found him standing next to the chair, that stupid unreadable expression on his face. Thanking him quietly, she opened it and took a piece of the leather-like jerkied meat out, tearing off a strip and popping it into her mouth. She didn’t care much for it, honestly. It was tough to chew and had a stale sort of flavor that made her wonder how long it’d been sitting in the crate. But if it would make him happy to see her eat, she would eat.

“How are you feeling?”

Looking up again, Iza had to think about it for a moment before she shrugged.

“Tired, I guess. But that’s not new.” After a thoughtful pause, she added, “Relaxed. I think I needed whatever it is you did to my back.”

Anakin choked on the piece of jerky in his mouth and had to open the water for a sip in order to stop coughing. Iza slowed her chewing as she watched him, tilting her head curiously. When he looked at her, it was from the corner of his eye and he looked sheepish as hell. Was she not supposed to have acknowledged the massage?

“You had a lot of knots,” he said finally, offering her the bottle of water. She took it just to wash the taste of the jerky out of her mouth. “I didn’t actually intend to…”

“It’s okay,” she waved a dismissive hand and shook her head. “It didn’t bother me. You would’ve known if it had.”

“You’re not shy about telling me not to touch you,” he nodded in agreement, snorting. “I’m glad it seems to have helped.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t return the favor.”

He choked again. Waving his hand at the water, he tried not to guzzle it down when Iza passed it back and seemed to avoid her gaze. Shaking his head rapidly, Anakin let out a nervous laugh and capped the bottle, leaning over her to set it on the console.

“It’s all right, sweetness,” he rubbed at the back of his neck and fished around in his packet for another piece of jerky. Another short, nervous laugh escaped him. “My back is fine. But thank you.”

“You’ve been carrying me around and sleeping on that awful cot. I very much doubt that, Anakin.”

“You’re not heavy,” giving her a look, he waved the strip of meat at her. “And I’ve slept in worse places.”

“I _am_ heavy,” she made a face at him and stuck her tongue out. “I’m almost sixty-eight kilos.”

“ _Ooooh_ , so heavy.” Wiggling his fingers, Anakin grinned impishly when Iza fixed him with a hard glare. “Come on now, sweetness. How weak do you think I am? I can carry around Master Obi-Wan without a problem. You’re nothing.”

Iza didn’t know if she wanted to continue arguing with him. She didn’t care terribly about her weight in the first place, but it was different when someone was hauling her around the way Anakin had been. The last thing she needed was for him to think it was something that _bothered_ her on a regular basis. Hearing him grunt as though satisfied that he’d won the argument, the brunette fought against the urge she had to start another one. She did _not_ want to ruin this mood any further. She liked the peace that had settled between them. It would be a damn shame to disturb it. Pulling another piece of jerky from her packet, she turned her attention back to the transparisteel. The thunder and lightning had faded off into the distance but the rain was still falling as heavily as ever. Leaning back in the chair, she sighed quietly as she watched it drum against the surface and run down in thick streaks. It was rather hypnotizing to watch, honestly. She got distracted by trying to predict where one stream would connect to another and where the drops would fall. It seemed as though they never hit the same spot twice, although she could _swear_ she’d seen it happen at least once. The longer she watched, the deeper she seemed to sink into the chair until her feet were sliding off of the seat, startling her back to alertness. _Man_ , she was not going to miss this exhaustion when all of this was over.

Across from her, Anakin had taken up the other chair and appeared to be watching her carefully. He must’ve been monitoring to make sure she wasn’t having another weird fit. That was sweet of him, but unnecessary. Raising a brow at her when she looked at him, he smiled.

“Bed?”

Iza didn’t know what time it was but she nodded anyway. Pushing upright in the chair, she started to get to her feet when he beat her to it and scooped her smoothly from her seat. Letting out a soft noise of surprise, the brunette wound her arms around his shoulders and stared up at him, getting a smug look in return. _This little…_

“See?” He said quietly, his tone strangely soft. “Not heavy.”

“You’re annoying.” Iza smiled as she said it, resting her cheek against his shoulder. He chuckled quietly above her and just shook his head. Once in the room, he carefully spilled her back onto her feet and let her get comfortable on the bed before climbing in beside her. They did the usual routine of awkwardness of being unsure how to rest against one another, eventually settling in with her back propped against his chest. This time, Anakin was not shy about tucking his head against hers, or about winding his arm around her middle. Iza didn’t mind. She simply cuddled into him and his warmth and dozed off to the sound of the rain pounding against the starship outside.

~*~*~*~

 _Hot_.

The air inside the room was almost unbearable when Iza stirred awake. There’d been a shift in the humidity during the night and it had made everything feel thick and damp around her. The blanket had been kicked off at some point but she wasn’t sure if she’d done it or if it was Anakin’s doing. He wasn’t beside her anymore. She smelled cigarettes. He must’ve gotten up. The robe she wore stuck to her skin uncomfortably and she sat up to peel it off, dropping it beside the bed before looking around. The light from the hallway was blocked out for half a second when Anakin’s tall frame came sauntering back in. Even in the dark, he looked miserable. His hair was damp like hers, and his skin was sticky with sweat when he settled down on the bed beside her. Iza sat looking at him for a long moment, breathing in the lingering scent of smoke he’d brought with him, and turned to lie back down so she faced him.

He still slid his arm around her and drew her in close and Iza was quick to tuck her head beneath his chin. It took a moment for them to find a comfortable way to nestle together like this in the suffocating heat, but both were content once they’d managed to tangle their legs together and shift out of the awkward state. Iza could feel him playing with her hair and smelled the cigarette on his breath as it fanned out across her cheek. The delicate brush of fingers down her back made her shiver and she planted her face in his chest, hearing the quietest snicker rise in his throat. He still smelled like the soap she’d used on his skin. Soap and a little like rainwater. _Hot_.

Twisting away, Iza sprawled on her back and swept her hand over her face to try and clear the sweat from it. When Anakin turned over beside her and tucked in closer, she slid an arm around his shoulders and held him. If he wanted to stay close, he was welcome to. She just couldn’t _breathe_ curled into him like that. She started to doze again, the soft puff of his breath against her neck cooling her skin slightly. It wasn’t enough to help anything. She doubted anything but a dip in the waterfall pool would help right now. She must’ve been half asleep when she felt him shifting beside her again and she was suddenly dragged against the heavy heat of his chest. He’d turned on his side again and the hand splayed against her hip with its long fingers pressing into the soft flesh felt so damn possessive. Iza wondered if he was asleep. She didn’t have long to think about it when he nuzzled his face up against the side of her neck, tickling her in the process. She giggled sleepily, bringing her hand up from around his shoulders to tunnel it into his hair. _So damn hot_.

“Iza,”

She picked her head up, twisting to look at him. He only gazed at her in the dark, his eyes glittering in the light pouring in from the corridor. He tilted his head and sealed his soft lips over hers. Iza gasped into his mouth feeling his tongue glide smoothly between her lips, tasting and stroking. She let him fill her mouth with the taste of cigarette smoke still thick on his tongue and shivered. His hands pawed lightly over the bare surface of her belly, though they never moved any higher or lower. Occasionally, his fingers snagged the hem of the under-tunic she wore, but he was careful not to venture where he was not invited. She stared at him when he drew back, glassy eyed and breathing in soft pants. Leaning over, Iza lured him in for another kiss, hearing him groan quietly. He smiled against her lips, wrapping his arms around her and drawing her closer to his chest. They kissed for a long while, losing themselves in their slow exploration of each other’s mouths. Finally, he released her mouth and trailed kisses to her shoulder before nuzzling the nape of her neck with a sigh.

Iza didn’t know what to do with herself. His hands had stopped moving and he’d relaxed behind her as though he’d intended to fall asleep. Surely he had not done this in his sleep? How tragic would it be if he woke the next morning and didn’t remember such a sweet kiss? Turning her head to look at him, she found him with his eyes closed and his face pressed to her shoulder. His breathing was still quite heavy. Maybe he was trying to relax himself? Letting out a tiny, confused huff, Iza ran her fingers through his hair and waited. Nothing. Bowing, she nosed at his forehead. _Nothing_. A soft sort of sadness settled in her chest at the idea that he had not meant to share that moment with her. But he’d looked right at her. He’d said her name. _Maybe_ …

“Anakin?”

He grunted. He did not sound alert at all. That sadness grew into a tightness that strangled her and sucked the remaining air out of the room. Even with as hot and sticky as it was in here, she suddenly felt very cold. Shifting to try and pull away, Iza let out a whine when Anakin hauled her back. The sound seemed to rouse him and he picked his head up, sleepy eyes looking her over.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she hoped he’d attribute her erratic breathing to the unbearable heat of the room. “Go back to sleep.”

He sat there for a moment, seemingly contemplating something.

“You feel distressed.”

“I’m fine.” She said it a little too quickly but she didn’t care. She just wanted him to go back to sleep.

“Iza,” a gentle hand came up to turn her over and he looked her over again with those tired eyes, frowning. After a moment or two, he shifted closer and nestled his head against hers, winding an arm around her to cuddle her close. Iza almost pulled away again but he was just too damn strong and she was too tired. Pressing her lips together tightly, she felt the sadness in her chest move higher until it was streaking down her cheeks and soaking into the pillow beneath her head. Behind her, Anakin sighed deeply and nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck. “Sweetness, it’s okay,”

He didn’t have a single clue in the universe, did he? He’d done it all in his sleep and he wouldn’t remember any of it in the morning. That was just her damn luck. It was what she deserved, really. Just another punishment from the Force for screwing things up so horribly. Swallowing thickly, she shut her eyes against the next flood of tears and did her best to try and go back to sleep.

She would not sleep as soundly tonight.


	3. Every Time We Kiss

Iza did not get out of bed the next day. Even with as hot as it was inside of the starship, she stayed curled up on her side under the blanket and stared at the wall for hours. Occasionally she would blink. Sometimes she’d sigh. For the most part, she just wished she could leave this awful planet and go home. Her mind would not allow her to forget what had happened the night before. Over and over it replayed—in vivid detail—the way Anakin had kissed her. His lips had been so soft against hers and the taste of his mouth was intoxicating. Vaguely, she wondered if that had to do with the cigarette he’d smoked before he’d gotten back into bed. Maybe it was just _him_. It had been such a dizzying experience too, that kiss. Iza had never been kissed in such a way before. She’d never thought she’d ever want to kiss _him_ in such a way, either. The longer she sat and thought about it, the more she was beginning to realize that all of those soft looks he gave her and the gentle way he treated her— _Anakin_ had certainly wanted to kiss her that way. And the more time they spent together, the easier it’d become for her to tolerate him and while Iza would never say that she’d truly _disliked_ him, she could never have pictured herself _yearning_ for him like this.

It wasn’t that she didn’t find Anakin attractive. He was cute. But he was also _annoying_. He had a serious tendency to be very smug and oftentimes arrogant—though she supposed at some points he had reason to be. He was good at a lot of things he did and he had become a very good Jedi. He was also very playful and fun to be around when he wasn’t busy being irritating. They’d been Padawans together. Her master had left her with his master on a few occasions while he went offworld to do things that he felt were far too dangerous for her when she was younger— _she_ objected, but she hadn’t complained much because she got to spend time with Master Kenobi. Anakin had been more of a troublemaker back then, always sneaking out and causing fuss for his poor master. He’d taken her with him once. Being the older one, Iza probably should’ve objected but she’d wanted to make sure he was safe and wandering around the streets of Coruscant at night was anything but safe. He’d taken her for a joyride in someone else’s speeder and she’d made the declaration that she would _never_ get in a speeder—or any flying vehicle—with him for the rest of her life.

She probably should’ve stuck to that, now that she was thinking about it.

Iza had always gotten the strange sense that Anakin liked spending time with her, but she was always so focused on her studies and her assignments that she didn’t really pay much attention to him. Besides, her master hadn’t wanted her to hang around him too much. He’d never given a solid reason other than he was an influence that she didn’t need. _A distraction_. Perhaps if he knew how much Master Kenobi was a distraction for her in those years, he might’ve felt more inclined to keep her away from _him_ instead. That old crush had gone seemingly unnoticed, however. Master Kenobi was polite and probably a little too generous with his time, but it seemed no matter how hard she’d dropped hints he never seemed to pick them up. It made her sad to think about sometimes. He made a good friend though, and an excellent mentor. She could live with that. Somehow, thinking about it now made her feel odd. Like it wasn’t something she ought to have in her head when she had been spending so much time with Anakin. Even if he couldn’t remember the kisses that they’d shared, it’d still been such an intimate moment between them and it had affected her quite strongly. Iza had been very weepy and emotional since the crash—very unlike herself in her normal day to day—but this felt _different_. To have been met with the knowledge that he’d been fast asleep and perhaps even unable to enjoy it the way she had, it truly bothered her.

It was around the ten-thousandth time she’d sighed when she heard his boots approaching. Quickly ducking her head, she closed her eyes to pretend she was sleeping and heard him stop next to the bed.

“Sweetness?”

She grunted.

“Are you feeling all right?” He sounded concerned. “Are you having one of the headaches?”

Iza shook her head and tried to bury her face further into the pillow. She didn’t want to look at him if she didn’t have to. It had been hard enough waking up this morning to his face beside hers. As she’d predicted, he didn’t seem to remember a thing about the night prior. If he did, he wasn’t saying anything about it. Feeling the bed dip, she almost whined as he leaned over her and brushed the hair away from her face.

“Iza,” _she would **not** open her eyes._ “You haven’t gotten up all day. You’re making me worried.”

“Tired.” She hoped it didn’t sound like she was pouting. That was the last thing she needed was for him to question the tone of her mumbling.

“Did you not sleep well last night?”

“Fine.”

She heard a change in his breathing pattern behind her and felt the bed shift again, but he didn’t get up. The light thudding of his boots hitting the floor was the only warning she had before he was settling in behind her, pressing up against her back and resting his chin on her shoulder. He didn’t say anything as he trailed the tips of his fingers down her arm and back up again, but she could tell he wanted to.

“Have I done something?” He asked after a while, voice low. Iza didn’t know how to answer him. On the one hand— _yes_. He’d definitely done something. But he’d done it in his sleep and she wasn’t sure she even had a right to be upset about it. She simply had to suffer with it. When she didn’t say anything, he sighed heavily and rested his forehead to her shoulder. “ _Iza,_ ”

“No.” Suffer. She would just have to suffer. It wasn’t fair to make him think he had done something wrong when he _hadn’t_. Maybe it wasn’t fair that she had to live with being the only one who remembered the kisses, but Anakin went through enough worry when it came to her.

“What’s _wrong_ , sweetness?”

Iza wished she could pull her shields up. She wished she could take some of the static floating around her and just make it into one giant bubble to block him out. Maybe it would make it easier to lie to him. It was so screwed up knowing that he could feel how upset she was while she insisted she was fine. She couldn’t imagine what that must’ve been doing to him. Leaning back into him a little more—why hadn’t she noticed he wasn’t wearing a shirt?—Iza tipped her head lightly to settle it against his and just shrugged.

“Are you angry that I won’t let you leave the starship?”

“No.”

“And you’re _sure_ you’re feeling okay?”

“Yes.”

“ _Iza, please_ ,” gently nudging her shoulder, Anakin turned her over onto her back so she would look at him. Iza immediately regretted opening her eyes. That sad, sorry look would haunt her long after they got back to Coruscant. She just knew it. “I _know_ something isn’t right. Please just tell me.”

He was attractive. Even with his pretty blue eyes so full of worry, he was so stupidly attractive. His hair had fallen across his forehead, still slightly damp with sweat. It was so gross in the starship. She wished the cooler was working. His cheeks were veiled thinly with sweat as well. She wondered if it was from the humidity or if he’d been working. His brows were furrowed in concern, full lips pinched in a soft frown. _Still attractive_. Reaching up, Iza gently combed the hair away from his face, noting that the dampness of the air seemed to bring out the curl in the strands. Bringing her hand further back she pulled him down and tipped her head up, pressing her lips to that soft frown of his. At first, he seemed surprised—startled, even. And then he was relaxing and parting his lips to allow her to slide her tongue past them. They were both tentative at first—Iza behaving as though she hadn’t already indulged in his kisses—and then each kiss gradually built in depth and hunger until Anakin had to move over her to get a better angle.

She let him settle between her knees, sliding her arms up around his shoulders and sighing quietly into his mouth as Anakin kissed her until her toes curled. His mouth was softer than she remembered. His lips suctioned hers in drugging little circles, drew her bottom one between them to nibble lightly before releasing it and flashing a quick smile. She did her best to follow his lead, luring his tongue into her mouth and sucking at it until he groaned and settled a fair amount of his weight against her. The air in the room was getting thicker, hotter. The longer they kissed, the harder it was becoming to want to pull back. _This_ was what she’d wanted the night before. More of this drugging sensation. He had left her with such a deep sense of longing that she was worried if they stopped now, it would only come back to torment her again. She could taste the sweat on his upper lip; _feel_ just what all of the kissing was doing to him as it pressed against her belly. Running her fingers up along the back of his neck, she slipped them back into his hair and broke away to breathe, gazing up at him with a lazy sort of smile.

“ _Stars above_ , sweetness,” his smile matched hers and he dipped his head to kiss her chin, trailing down along her jaw with a chuckle. “Is this really what you’re so moody about? Because I can handle this.”

 _Moody_. What a way to phrase it. As Iza tried to stop her head from spinning and breathe the air that had become stiflingly thick and damp, she laughed breathlessly and gave his hair a playful tug. She felt the groan he gave as it reverberated against her chest, tilting her head to let him press his lips along her neck. His hands were curled tight in the material of her under-tunic and she could tell he wanted to move them elsewhere. _She_ wanted him to move them elsewhere. She could still feel the way he’d passed them over her skin the night before. She wanted to feel it again.

“Anakin,” she tipped her head further and arched beneath him, watching as he picked his head up to look at her. He seemed hesitant as he licked his bottom lip and continued fussing with the material trapped between his fingers.

“I’m not sure we should,” he murmured after a moment or so of silent contemplation. When Iza’s face fell, he leaned in and kissed her sweetly in an attempt to soothe her. “Not that I don’t want to. I just think it falls under… strenuous activity.”

_Strenuous…?_

Lightly thumping her head against the pillow, Iza glared up at the ceiling of the starship and huffed. Everything in her screamed at her to argue. This was unfair. She was _actually_ going to have to suffer with this feeling now even though Anakin was awake and alert and willing to give her more of his kisses. What a _joke_. What a cruel thing the Force was.

“Please don’t be upset,” he brushed his mouth along the hollows of her collarbone, trailing to her shoulder and then up over her neck again. “If I thought it was safe…”

“I don’t understand how it _isn’t_ ,” tracing one of her fingers across the swell of his shoulder, Iza did her best not to pout. It was bad enough she’d given in to the urge to whine about it. “I don’t understand how _any_ of it isn’t safe,”

“Sweetness,” he pulled up to look at her, one of his hands coming up to brush the bits of hair from her face. “You hit your head. That’s a pretty serious thing. Look at what happens to you when you try to connect to the Force. Look at how tired you are all the time—and it’s nearly been a week. You still zone out a lot, even if you don’t notice. The droid said to keep your brain activity as low as possible and I’m pretty sure _this_ would go against that. By a lot.”

“I feel fine. Mostly.” Iza shrugged. “Stuff still feels kind of staticky because I can’t feel the Force, but…”

“Iza,” he smiled lightly and nudged his nose against the side of her head. “Please don’t try to bargain with me for this. I would feel so terrible if I ended up causing some sort of setback for you.”

She hated him. She hated him and his stupid, attractive face. Why did he have to care so damn much?

“Do you remember kissing me last night, Anakin?”

The younger Jedi picked his head up again and stared at her for a long moment, blue eyes shifting over her face before darting away. His brows forked downward as his eyes narrowed in deep thought and he let out a quick rush of breath before dropping his head onto her shoulder.

“I thought I was dreaming.” He mumbled. It was difficult to tell whether he sounded regretful or ashamed of himself. “We were back at the waterfall. I guess I just…”

Well, now Iza didn’t know how to feel. It seemed like he felt more remorse for the fact that he’d done it while he was asleep than the fact that he’d done it _at all_. Still, it left a funny feeling in the pit of her stomach to know he had truly not meant to kiss her like that at all. Now she looked like a fool.

“Is… is this why you’ve been in bed all day?” Anakin asked, raising his head. “Did I upset you?”

Iza let out a dry laugh and wouldn’t look at him as she shook her head.

“I upset myself.” And she was honestly making it worse by continuing to think about it. She didn’t resist when he brushed a finger against the side of her jaw to encourage her to look at him, though she wished that maybe she wasn’t pouting as hard as she was. For a while, they just gazed at one another until he tipped his head forward and rested his forehead to hers with a heavy sigh.

“I don’t know if we should share the bed anymore.”

Iza flinched back and sat up on her elbows, staring. _What the hell?_

“You’re joking?” She laughed shortly and waited for some kind of sign that _maybe_ he was. He did not appear to be. His eyes were fixed on the pillow and he was frowning lightly. “ _Anakin_ ,”

“Iza I don’t want to run the risk of us getting carried away,” crystalline blue eyes flicked upward to meet hers, full of worry and light regret. “It’s safer this way.”

“But I can’t sleep without you.” She waved a hand and tried to fight off the weird chill that had washed over her. “That’s the _only_ way I can sleep. Surely you’ve figured that out by now?”

“I can stay until you’ve fallen asleep but I think it’s better if I sleep up front.”

Iza felt her mouth pinching tightly in an effort to keep a frown from forming as she stared at him. When his features didn’t change, she pushed him away and turned to roll off of the bed.

“Iza—”

“Leave me alone,” scooping up the outer robe she’d dumped on the floor the previous night, she slipped it on and walked briskly towards the door. She could hear the cot creaking under his weight and the soft slap of his bare feet as he tried to catch up with her, but she twisted before he had a chance to take her by the arm. The loading ramp had been lowered to let the air in. She happily wandered down and was met with wet dirt beneath her feet.

“Iza, you know you shouldn’t—”

“I _said_ —” her voice cracked. “— _leave me alone_.”

She wouldn’t look at him, wouldn’t stop as she headed down the path they’d taken to get to the waterfall the previous day. Behind her, she heard him cussing and thought she heard the rustle of cloth for at least a few steps. She just kept walking. She had been made to cry in front of him for _days_ now over stupid things. She would _not_ let him see her cry over him. What a fool. What a damn fool she was. To think she might have started caring about a boy who hadn’t even kissed her because he _wanted_ to. Who’d done it because he was so locked in a dream that he couldn’t establish the difference between it and reality. And she’d gone and done an even more foolish thing by kissing him and nearly begging him to bed her. _Idiot_. That’s what she was. A true idiot. She hated him. She hated him and his annoying behavior and his stupid face and how he was the only person she had for company on this dumb planet. She hated knowing that she wouldn’t be able to rest comfortably anymore. She hated that she wouldn’t wake up to him bringing the smell of his late-night cigarette breath into bed. She hated that he wouldn’t hold her and breathe quiet sounds into the back of her neck. _She hated him_.

Iza was in a full-blown sobbing fit by the time she reached the waterfall. Somehow, it wasn’t quite as beautiful as it’d been the day before. She tried to find a spot to sit that wasn’t slick with mud and settled for an area of rocks close enough to feel the spray as the water crashed into the pool below. It felt nice on her sticky skin, but did nothing to calm the heaviness in her chest. Her head hurt. It swam so violently that she had to put it between her knees to keep from vomiting. She didn’t want to prove Anakin right that she was still too ill to be outside by herself. That crawling sensation had started beneath her skin again but at least she didn’t feel like she might black out. Doing her best to try and focus on the sound of the water to try and calm down, Iza shut her eyes and slowed her breathing. She hadn’t really meant to fall asleep.

~*~*~*~

Her body felt strangely numb as she sauntered slowly down the path as night fell around her. Iza had woken up to the sound of something crowing above her in the trees and knew immediately that she was going to be in trouble. _Whatever_. She made as little noise as possible when she climbed the loading ramp, glancing towards the sound of metal on metal and frustrated swearing to find Anakin shoulder deep in the floor of the starship. She said nothing and continued on to the sleeping quarters. Keeping the light off, she shrugged out of the borrowed robe and dropped it on the floor before going to the crate for one of the ration packs of meal bars. Opening it, she took half and left the rest on the lid. There was a cloth on the floor that she picked up and used to wipe the dirt from her feet before she settled down on the bed and ate the bland nutritional bar. There was very little water left in the bottle beside the bed. She left it. She could choke the thing down without it. When she’d finished, she lay there for a while and stared up at the ceiling, listening to Anakin in the cockpit as he worked. He sure did swear a lot for a Jedi. She wondered if Master Kenobi knew he used those words. There was a pause in the metallic noises after a while and a strange _click_ and suddenly, the starship was filled with the smell of cigarette smoke.

The scent wafted up her nose and choked her. It gripped her throat tight enough to bruise, drawing the tiniest of gasps out of her and bringing back that horrible sadness from earlier in the afternoon. Rolling over onto her belly, Iza buried her face against the pillow— _the smell of him was so thick here_ —and heaved her next breath into it. She tried to be quiet. She tried not to let any whines or whimpers escape the confines of her strangled throat. She wished she’d done a better job. Iza didn’t hear him swear this time, didn’t hear his feet against the floor, but she felt the air shift just before the cot dipped heavily and his sweat-slick arms wrapped her up tight and pulled her into him. His mouth was hot against her shoulder and the spot behind her ear, breath heavily laden with tobacco as he whispered soft apologies and soothing words of comfort to her. She continued to cry. Even when her heart no longer felt hurt, she couldn’t seem to stop. He turned her in his arms and pressed his kisses across her cheeks and over her forehead, sliding his hands up to the sides of her face to sweep away the tears with his thumbs and then kiss her closed eyelids too. It took time, but he calmed her, quieted her. And when she was back to breathing evenly again, he sealed his lips over hers and kissed her there, too.

Iza wouldn’t deny the soft kiss. She was too damn desperate for his comfort. The tips of her fingers rested against his jaw and she settled her forehead to his cheek when he inevitably pulled away. His hands slid back into her hair, one lightly curling around the back of her neck. She shifted closer in spite of the stifling heat around them and cuddled as close as she could. They didn’t speak. There were no more sweet kisses traded. Just gentle passes of fingertips along damp skin and quiet breathing. It was so silly how she could already feel herself dozing off in the comfort of his presence. Maybe she’d just worn herself out again. At least her head didn’t hurt this time and she didn’t feel sick. Iza wasn’t sure if she ought to tell him that’d happened. He might start worrying again and she didn’t want that.

“I’m sorry,” his whisper cut through the silence and stirred her back to alertness. For a moment, she was confused. She couldn’t remember what he’d have to be sorry for. As the rest of the sleepiness began to drain away, _she remembered_.

“Will you stay?” Iza almost didn’t want to ask. She didn’t want to know the answer. If he still intended to leave as soon as she fell asleep, she didn’t want the anticipation in her chest. She felt the push of his head against hers as he nodded.

“I’ll stay.”

“All night?”

A soft gust of breath fanned out across her cheek as he let out a quiet laugh. It tickled her skin.

“All night, sweetness.”

She was satisfied with that. Tipping her head up, Iza gently nudged her lips against his and sighed quietly when he leaned into her and accepted the kiss. They took it much slower than before, seemingly content to simply remain soft and sweet with one another. She smiled against his mouth when he lowered his hands to her hips and held her closer, her fingers tracing slowly along the sides of his neck as they exchanged kiss after kiss after kiss until she lost count and her head swam from the lovely feeling they left behind. She likely wouldn’t have noticed the change in how often she was returning his kisses if Anakin hadn’t eased back and cupped the sides of her head again, his blue eyes giving her a strange look.

“Sweetness?” His tone was quite firm for someone who’d just pulled out of a makeout session. “Hey— _Iza_ ,”

“Mm?” She felt a bit foggy and slow to react. _Tired_. He was giving her that damn worried look again now and she almost scoffed at it. Whining quietly when he pulled away completely to sit up, Iza grumbled at him when he lifted her from the bed and carried her out into the corridor where the light was brighter. Wincing away from it, she planted her face against his shoulder and huffed. “What are you doing?”

“Look at me for a minute,” he didn’t give her a chance to object as he hooked a finger around the curve of her chin and turned her head, nudging her gently so she’d open her eyes. It took a moment before she would and she stared at him, frowning.

“ _What?_ ”

He didn’t say anything. He seemed to silently be searching for something as he gazed at her. After a few moments, he turned and carried her towards the cockpit, settling her in one of the seats before he went to the cabinet where the medic droid was stored. Staring after him, Iza felt a sense of panic start to settle in her chest.

“Anakin?”

“Something doesn’t feel right,” he murmured, pulling the droid from its resting place to activate it. “Your eyes don’t look right to me.”

“What do you mean?” The panic was getting worse now and she sat up a little straighter in the chair. “ _Anakin?_ ”

“I need you to run a scan,” he was talking to the droid but his eyes were fixed on her. “Run her vitals. _Check her_.”

“Yes sir,” the droid steered itself over to where Iza sat, its LED panel casting a faint glow across her face. Iza only stared past it at Anakin, who rubbed his upper lip in concern. “Please look forward and relax, Jedi Tacor,”

 _Relax?_ This bucket of bolts wanted her to _relax?_ She’d been perfectly relaxed a few minutes ago before Anakin had hauled her out of the bed for this. Now she felt like she was going to be sick and pass out.

“Iza,” Anakin’s voice was gentle, but he didn’t move from his spot. “Please, sweetness,”

She shut her eyes, took a breath, and then opened them again to look at the droid as it’d asked. It took a fair amount of restraint not to flinch when it cast the bright blue beam of its scanner across her face and temporarily blinded her. It was a little easier the second time around when the beam slid back upward, but Iza’s eyes still squinted with the need to close. A quiet series of beeps followed, but the droid didn’t speak. It continued on with its checkup, ran a second scan of her head and another one of just her eyes. She was seeing little spots by the time it let out a mechanical _hum_ and wheeled back from her.

“There appears to be mild swelling of brain tissue. This is likely due to a second impact upon her cranium. Has she had any falls, Jedi Skywalker?”

Anakin’s face was almost chalk white as he nodded slowly.

“Yeah. But I don’t know if she hit her head.”

“To be safe, I will administer a steroidal injection to aid in the relief. I highly advise you to keep her off her feet for the next few days. No unnecessary stimuli. Keep her well hydrated.”

“Sure,” he nodded again and pointed his eyes towards the floor. Iza stared at him from her seat and wished he’d look at her. Even when the droid came back over and stuck her with a syringe full of something that _burned_ , she wished he would at least _look_ at her. The light pat of a metal hand against her arm drew her attention to the medic droid and she wondered if it was trying to offer some form of comfort because her fellow Jedi would not.

“You will be okay, Jedi Tacor. Please get rest.” And then it was wheeling itself back to the cabinet where it belonged and Anakin was helping to put it back into its deactivated state. When the door had been shut again, he stood there staring at it before he took a deep breath and let it out in a sigh.

“I shouldn’t have gone out yesterday,” he mumbled, shaking his head. Iza flinched and tilted her head at him.

“Don’t blame yourself for this,” why did the idea of that make her so sick all of a sudden? “Anakin— _I_ was the one who reached into the Force. I did it to myself.”

“Well if I hadn’t let you get your way, you wouldn’t have done that.”

“See? Still _my_ fault.”

He shot her a frustrated sort of look and growled quietly under his breath. Another shake of his head followed and he pounded his fist against the cabinet door.

“This whole thing is my damn fault. I shouldn’t have even brought you out here. I should’ve kept you to an easier flying space.”

“ _Anakin_ ,”

“If I’d known it was comet season, I would never—”

“ _Anakin, **stop**._”

“You need to get back in bed,” Anakin said thickly, clearing his throat. He still wouldn’t look at her directly. “Come on,”

Iza didn’t budge. She just stared at him from where she sat and wondered if it was the shot that still burned in her veins or if it was his sudden change of demeanor that made her feel so awful. She saw his shadow approaching and should’ve expected it when he lifted her from her spot. She hadn’t. She smacked her hands against his chest and pushed a foot against his stomach, twisting out of his grip before pushing him out of her way to head down the corridor. She didn’t immediately hear him follow. He was probably a little stunned by the move. She supposed he had a right to be. She’d been pretty compliant about letting him carry her around these last few days. But she was _angry_. Angry that he would put any of the blame on himself and none of it on her. Angry that he had gone right back to behaving like her stern master. Angry that he likely would not come to bed with her anymore. Crawling onto the bed instead of throwing herself onto it like she wanted to, Iza curled up close to the wall and covered herself entirely with the blanket. She still didn’t hear his feet on the floor. That pissed her off even more. Giving a hard, flat-footed kick to the wall beside her, she yelled in frustration and did it again. _That_ brought him running.

“Hey—” he dropped beside her on the cot and pulled her back far enough from the wall to keep her from kicking it again. “Don’t do that.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.” She snapped back, gathering the ends of the blanket closed around her head.

“ _Iza_ ,” there was that fed up tone of his and that stupid sigh that always accompanied it. “Sweetness, you can’t get mad at me for wanting you to get better.”

“That’s _not_ why I’m mad.”

“I can’t… will you take this off your head?” He tugged at the blanket to try and get her to move it, but Iza clutched it tight and curled away from him. Anakin sighed again. “Listen—I don’t know why you’re determined to fight me again all of a sudden. I thought—”

“ _This isn’t **your** fault! It’s **my** fault! **Mine**!_” Turning over as she whipped the blanket off of her head, Iza frowned at him hard as her chest heaved. “You’re so _annoying_ , Anakin! It’s bad enough that you’ve done nothing but worry about me all week. Do you think I want you feeling guilty on top of it? _I don’t_. It was _my_ carelessness that got us here. _Mine_.”

“Please…” he looked like the last thing he wanted was to say this to her. “Sweetness, settle down. _Please_.”

Iza huffed at him and glared before she sank back against the pillow and turned her head away from him. She would listen, but only because she didn’t want him worrying even more. Closing her eyes when he leaned over and pressed a kiss to her temple, the brunette absently tilted her head towards him and swallowed thickly.

“It’s not fair that you have to worry about me,” she said quietly. “We could have been out of here by now if I hadn’t hit my damn head.”

“No, sweetness,” he shifted beside her and propped himself on an arm, nudging her chin with his fingers to try and get her to look at him. “The starship is going to take more work than I thought— _for one_. And two—what do you expect of me? That I’d just… _not_ worry? _You hit your **head** , Iza._ You’ve lost your connection to the Force. I don’t know what sort of person you think I am if you think I _wouldn’t_ be concerned or that I wouldn’t _care_.”

“I didn’t say you shouldn’t _care_. Of course I’d expect you to care, Anakin. You’d be a real lousy Jedi if you didn’t.” Unable to stop herself from leaning into his hand, Iza pouted lightly. “I just feel like I’ve taken up so much of your time and I don’t think it’s fair.”

“You wouldn’t have my time if I didn’t want to give it to you, Iza,”

“I don’t understand that part either,” she tried hard not to let her face crinkle the way that it did. It was such a stupid face she made whenever she was deeply confused by something. “I mean… I _kind of_ get it now. But you said it yourself—we don’t always get along.”

“Yes, and?” He gave a short laugh and raised an eyebrow. “Am I not allowed to be fond of you because of that?”

Iza _stared_. She knew the expression on her face had to be dumber than the last one but she couldn’t help it. She’d had a suspicion—of course—but having it confirmed was a bit jarring. Tilting her head slightly in wonder, she reached up and brushed a finger against his cheek. The corner of her mouth twitched lightly upward at the way he leaned into the touch and smiled at her. _Sweet. Warm. Attractive._ That odd feeling in her belly was back again, tickling its way up into her chest like thousands of tiny butterflies all fluttering their wings at once. It made her inhale sharply and put a sense of realization into her that jarred her all over again. _Oh_. Maybe she was just as fond of him, too.

“You okay?” He looked like he wasn’t sure if it was appropriate to be amused. She must’ve gotten a faraway look or something. Nodding quickly, Iza trailed her fingertip to his mouth and along his bottom lip. Funny how she’d kissed him before realizing what that silly feeling meant. She thought perhaps all of the closeness had just been getting to the two of them. She’d never imagined that _maybe_ she actually liked him and his annoying ways. She gave a true smile when he dipped his head and kissed her fingertip, bringing her eyes up to meet his and letting out a quiet hum.

“You have such pretty eyes,” she didn’t know why that was what came out of her mouth. She didn’t care. Anakin’s features shifted lightly in surprise before he let out a bashful sort of sound and dropped his head forward, poking his tongue into his cheek in an attempt to stop a grin from spreading across his lips. Tilting her head further to try and look at him, Iza palmed his jaw and pulled him down, nudging his flushed cheek with the end of her nose. “Don’t hide from me,”

He gave another quick rush of breath that sounded like a nervous laugh, but he didn’t immediately look at her. Instead, he settled his forehead against hers and finally let the goofy little grin he’d tried to hide spread across his lips.

“You’re cute,” she grinned back at him, brushing a bit of hair back behind his ear.

“ _Stop it, Iza,_ ” he dropped his head to her shoulder and made another one of those strange, flustered noises. It was almost comical to see him react in such a way. Anakin held himself with such confidence most of the time that it was difficult to picture him falling to pieces over a few silly compliments. Yet—here he was, burying his face to try and hide the way she’d made him turn bright scarlet. Giggling at him, she ran her fingers through his hair and turned to kiss the side of his head.

“Why should I?”

“These are things I should say to _you_.” His voice was muffled but he didn’t sound upset.

“But I said them to you first.”

He huffed against her neck and shook his head as much as he could.

“You are teasing me.” He grumbled.

“ _I am not_.”

He picked his head up to look at her, cheeks still carrying a fair amount of pink at their highest points, and gazed at her for a long time before leaning in to fit his lips over hers. The kiss took her by surprise with how gentle and tender it was. _Mindful_ seemed to be a good word for it. He was careful about how much he parted his lips, how much of her bottom one he pulled between them to gently graze the edges of his teeth over. He seemed almost hesitant to deepen it further until she let the point of her tongue brush lightly against the swell of his lower lip. Even then, he took care not to overwhelm her—or himself—and peppered quick, tiny kisses against her lips when he finally pulled back. Iza hadn’t wanted him to. She’d very nearly drawn him back to her with a tug to his hair and a soft whine, but she had a feeling it wouldn’t have gone over well. She knew he was trying to keep to the droid’s orders. Still, the sweetness of the kiss had left her with a need for _more_.

“You should rest,” he said quietly, running the back of his hand down the side of her face. “I’ve probably kept you up much longer than I should’ve.”

“I don’t want to,” Iza wasn’t _trying_ to argue against him. She just didn’t want to stop basking in the feelings they were sharing.

“Sweetness,” he gave her a look. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I’m not tired.”

“You’re _lying_ ,” smiling, the younger Jedi lightly tapped a fingertip against her chin. “You’re exhausted. I can see it and I can feel it, Iza.”

Now she _would_ whine at him. Pouting, the brunette lowered her gaze from his and shut her eyes when he kissed the middle of her forehead.

“I know, sweetness,” he whispered, sliding an arm around her to pull her close. “I don’t want to stop either.”

“Do we have to?”

“ _Iza_ ,” Anakin laughed quietly and tutted, pressing his lips together in a regretful sort of smile. “For tonight, I think it’d be best.”

“But we’re just kissing,” not that she’d complain if it went further. “Surely that can’t be very harmful?”

“Sweetness, I asked you before not to try and bargain with me over this.”

“ _Anakin_ ,” she ran her fingers through his hair and shifted to settle closer to him.

“Please don’t,” he pressed his lips to her hairline and heaved a harsh sigh. “I don’t want anything to happen to you.”

How the hell was she supposed to ignore that? It wouldn’t stop her from huffing or sagging against him in defeat, but Iza wouldn’t fight him anymore. When he dipped his head and gave her a quick, too-gentle kiss to her lips, she did her best not to follow after him and simply tucked her head beneath his chin instead. He was right. She _was_ tired. Not that it was any different from any other part of the day. But her arm ached from the shot she’d been given and she was mentally exhausted from just about _everything_. Fine. She’d let him win this time.

~*~*~*~

Sometime during the night, Iza broke out of Anakin’s cuddling grip and lay on her back. Half asleep, she was vaguely aware that the younger Jedi had turned on his side and pressed a long fingered hand against her exposed belly. She whimpered when he began stroking the skin, feeling something hot pooling below her belly button. He was slowly pushing her under-tunic up, exposing more soft skin, and paused an inch below her breasts.

“Iza?” He whispered to her.

She glanced at him, dazed, and nodded.

“It’s okay.” She arched a little when he slid his hand beneath the material, covering a breast with his hot palm. His burning touch made her hiss through her teeth. She felt him lightly pinch her nipple and whined. A gust of warm breath on her tight nipples made her look down to see Anakin’s blue eyes gazing at her curiously in the dim light. She bit her lip and brought a hand up to slide her fingers over his cheek. With a groan, he lowered his head and pressed feather light kisses to her breast, pausing to swirl the wet tip of his tongue around the nipple until it ached with sensation. Sucking it between his lips, Anakin bit down gently.

“ _Anakin!_ ” Iza’s hips jerked up, her hand fisting in his hair.

He chuckled, the sound a deep rumble in his chest. Suddenly, she was aware of his hand gliding down her belly again and she stiffened.

“Wait,” she murmured, watching him look up.

“What is it?”

Wetting her bottom lip with the tip of her tongue, Iza tried to steady her breathing and swallowed hard.

“Are you awake?”

Another soft chuckle followed her question and he bowed his head, pressing more kisses over the surface of her breasts before nodding.

“Very awake, sweetness,” he curled his tongue around one of her nipples and did something wicked with the edges of his teeth. The fingers on her belly slipped a fraction lower, making her squirm. “Should I stop?”

The answer she should have given was probably _yes_. This counted very much as _unnecessary stimuli_. He’d been so damn adamant about _not_ continuing to kiss her earlier in the night that Iza had to wonder what was driving him to behave this way _now_ if he wasn’t asleep.

“How many fingers do I have up?” She held up three shaky digits and watched as he picked his head up once more, giving her a funny look.

“Three,”

She put up another.

“Four now,”

She took three of them down.

“One,” letting out a laugh, Anakin pushed up on an arm and tilted his head at her. “Sweetness, are you okay?”

“I’m… I’m fine,” no, she was. She was perfectly okay with this. She was just a little confused. “I thought…”

“I know,” he smiled sheepishly and traced his fingertips along her abdomen from one hip to the other. “I know we probably shouldn’t. But _Force_ , Iza…”

“Did I do something?” Iza was suddenly very worried that she’d gone and groped him in her sleep. That was _much_ worse than being kissed. Anakin gave her that strange look again and paused the passes of his fingers, shaking his head slowly.

“No,” even in the dim light she could see him furrowing his brow. “Are you _sure_ you’re all right?”

“I’m not…” she blew out a breath and shook her head. “You were so worried about _kissing_ me, Anakin. I don’t understand…”

He fell silent for a moment, eyes shifting away from her like he was thinking about something. Iza knew as soon as he was taking a deep breath to sigh, he’d made his decision. His hand moved off of her belly and came up to comb through his hair. He kept his gaze diverted.

“Maybe I’m not as awake as I should be,” he started to sit up and move around like he was going to get up from the bed and Iza sat up, reaching for him with a soft noise of protest. He paused and looked at her, then offered a soft smile and leaned over to kiss her forehead. “I’m only going to have a smoke, sweetness,”

“Can I come with you?”

“I…” he looked a little surprised by the question. Shrugging lightly, he turned a hand up. “I suppose, if you really want to.”

Iza was all too eager to slide her legs over the edge of the bed, getting to her feet before he even had the chance to make it halfway off the cot. He snickered behind her and skimmed a hand between her shoulders, nudging her out of the room and up towards the cockpit. She didn’t immediately take a seat in one of the chairs, too busy watching him fish his packet of cigarettes out from where he kept it stashed in his toolbox. Part of her wondered why he did that. Maybe he thought she’d try to sneak one? Or maybe it was just a habit because he was used to having to hide it from Master Kenobi. Either way, it brought about the curiosity of whether or not he might run out before they got out of here. She was pretty sure that was the same packet he’d started with. Either he was really good at rationing, or he had a whole stash somewhere hidden on the ship that she had no idea about. Watching while he tapped one free to light it, Iza leaned up against one of the chairs and propped her chin against the top of it. It was a disgusting habit, really. Terrible for him in so many ways. But he made it look so damn _hot_. Not to mention the fact that it drove her nuts just to smell it on him.

“What are you looking at?” He’d dropped into the chair across from her and seemed to be watching her while she watched him. As her eyes followed the filter of his cigarette while he brought it to his lips, Iza rested her cheek against the top of the chair and drew her bottom lip between her teeth with a shrug.

“You.”

His brows quirked upwards and he nodded with a low grunt. _He knew that_. Tipping his head back to exhale the smoke at the ceiling, his blue eyes remained fixed on her and narrowed just enough to make her wonder what he might be thinking. She didn’t linger on that thought long. Her eyes were already shifting from his face to his shirtless form as it rested casually and carelessly in the chair. He really didn’t need to sit with his knees so far apart like that. The movement of his hand as it brought the cigarette back to his lips caught her attention and she studied the careful way he set his lips around the filter, drew the smoke in with a well-practiced pull to inhale and hold it for half a second—and then let it come streaming out slowly from his mouth and nostrils. His free hand lifted and gave a light wave to beckon her over and Iza didn’t bother trying to resist. Venturing across the space between them, she stood between his parted knees and watched as he took a final drag from the cigarette and stubbed it out on a metal bit of the chair. He dropped it into the toolbox blindly, eyes fully focused on her as he reached a hand out and pulled her closer by the front of her under-tunic.

Iza wasn’t going to wait for him to lift her onto his lap. Carefully, she slid one leg over and then the other, settling against him and relishing in the low sound he made. She giggled quietly as his arm wound around her back to pull her in flush against his chest, almost pouting when she leaned in to kiss him and he tipped his head back out of her reach. A playful sort of look flickered across his face and he eased in slowly, only to hover his lips above her mouth and _barely_ let the swell of his bottom one brush hers. Iza whined at him and tried to close the space between them only to have him move away again.

“ _Anakin!_ ”

“Hm?” He looked nonchalant as he smiled at her, smoothing his palms up and down along her sides. She stared at him for a long moment and then shifted on his lap in a way that put more of her weight against his pelvis, causing a soft growl to rise in his throat as he inadvertently rocked his hips up. “ _Iza_ ,”

“Kiss me,” the demand in her tone was soft, but she looked damn ready to do it again if he continued playing with her. A brow went up, followed by the corner of his mouth. He looked quite amused for someone getting ready to play with fire. When Iza dipped her head again and he avoided her a third time, the brunette gave a frustrated shout. “ ** _Anakin_** _!_ ”

“Take it easy,” he skimmed his fingertips all the way up to the sides of her face and pulled her down with a teasing chuckle and a wide grin, nuzzling the end of his nose against hers. “Come here, sweetness,”

Iza wasn’t sure if the smoky taste of his mouth was more intoxicating tonight because he’d toyed with her or because he’d _just_ put the damn cigarette out, but it made her sigh and melt into him all the same. Her fingertips moved blindly along the surface of his chest, mapping out each of his ribs at his sides and slipping further until he made a harsh sound and bit her lower lip. She shifted back on him just for the sake of tracing the defined lines of his abdomen, feeling the muscles tighten and shiver hard beneath the surface of his skin. When she dared to sweep her fingers lower, Anakin exhaled heavily into her mouth and caught her by the wrists to halt her.

“What are you doing?” He sounded rough and out of breath as he stole a kiss that was neither sweet nor gentle.

 _What a stupid question_.

“We can be careful,” Iza kissed back just as hungrily and shifted on his lap again, smiling at the way he hissed through his teeth and growled at her.

“Iza,” he looked like the last thing he wanted to do was object. “What did I say about bargaining?”

“I promise I’ll tell you if I start feeling weird,” she rolled her hips just enough to tease him. “I’ll stay mindful and I’ll be honest.”

“We don’t have…”

“I’m chipped.” She shrugged and smiled faintly, letting out a humorless laugh. “It’s safe.”

Anakin eyed for a moment, conflicted. Iza could tell that he wanted _very much_ to give in and carry her off to the back of the starship, but she could also see him struggling with his conscience. _She_ knew it wasn’t the best idea in the universe and that taking the risk wasn’t smart _at all_. The longer he sat there and looked at her, the more certain she became that he was going to say _no_. Even without the Force, she could feel him weighing his options and going over every possible _bad_ outcome. She wanted to goad him into saying yes, but that didn’t feel right. She’d already pushed this far when he’d asked her not to. _Truly_ pushing him would not go over well, she was sure. He’d released her wrists and settled his hands back on her hips, fingers smoothing over her skin in thoughtful passes while he continued studying her and _thinking_ silently to himself. Iza lowered her gaze to watch his chest rise and fall, lightly sucking her bottom lip into her mouth to lick the taste of his cigarette off of it. She felt him move and breathed a sharp gasp when his mouth met the side of her neck, teeth gently dragging over her skin as his hands squeezed her hips.

“You tell me,” he whispered, moving his mouth along her jaw. “ _The minute_ you feel strange. I mean it, sweetness. We shouldn’t do this at all.”

“ _I know_ , but…” her fingers slid deep into his hair, pulled gently at the roots. “ _Stars above_ , Anakin, _I need it._ I need _you_.”

“Trust me when I say I know the feeling,” he kissed his way over her chin and back up to her mouth, sealing his lips tightly over hers. She could only describe the kiss as _ravenous_. He couldn’t get enough and neither could she. She trapped his full bottom lip between her own, nibbling, sucking, _biting_. He growled at her when she tugged at it, digging his nails into her hips to pull her in tighter as he rocked up from the chair. His tongue swept across the seam of her mouth, slipped inside and lured her back into his to suck slowly until Iza was pulling at his hair and whimpering with need. Breaking away with a breathless laugh, Anakin pressed his forehead into hers and tried to catch his breath, allowing her to take each of the tinier kisses she stole from him. His hands slid from her hips to her backside and down along the sides of her thighs as he shifted to the edge of the chair to stand. “Hold onto me, sweetness. _Not my hair_.”

Iza laughed and wrapped her arms around his neck, curling her legs around his waist when he got to his feet. She waited while he adjusted her in his arms before she started kissing at his ear, giving it gentle tugs with her teeth as she breathed heavily against it. She heard him swear and felt him shiver lightly as he carried her into the bedroom, almost unwilling to let go when he tipped to carefully spill her onto her back across the cot. He joined her quickly, crawling up along her side and scattering her neck with hard kisses that made her gasp and squeal. It was her turn to shiver when he brushed his mouth against the shell of her ear and took her by the hip to haul her against him.

“Remember what you promised, sweetness,” he murmured, tipping his head to find a spot on her neck to mark. “Be mindful and _be honest_.”

“I will,” she nodded, grinning lazily. “I swear I will.”


	4. All I Want is You

_Annoyed_ was not a strong enough word to describe how Iza felt the next morning. She and Anakin had _barely_ gotten started when her head had gone fuzzy and she’d blacked out. She couldn’t understand how they’d gone as long as they had in the chair without a single issue, but the _moment_ he’d put his hands on her it was as though some switch had been flipped. At first, she thought maybe it’d been because of her breathing. He’d really riled her up with the way that he teased and taunted before slipping his fingers beneath the fabric of her underwear to finally give her a bit of relief from the torment. And then the next thing she knew, he was tapping at her face and saying her name in such a panicked tone that it’d scared her. Trying to talk him into resuming only resulted in an argument that had him threatening to sleep in the cockpit and Iza had been forced to give up on the idea that they would be able to do more than kiss for a _long_ while. Hell, she’d be lucky if he’d do _that_ with her anymore.

She’d woken up irritated with a splitting headache and immediately decided that the day would, once again, be spent glaring at the wall. She wouldn’t look at him, wouldn’t get up for anything. She wanted to go home. She wanted him to fix the communication port in the console and send a message back to the Temple so _someone_ could come and get them. She’d had enough of this. Surely there was someone back on Coruscant who could fix her head and make her normal again.

“Sweetness,” Anakin hadn’t gotten up yet either. He’d spent a good portion of the morning running his fingers over the small of her back, trying to soothe her and get her to at least acknowledge his presence. “Iza, you can’t be mad at me.”

“I’m not.” She wasn’t. Not entirely. She was frustrated that he wouldn’t stop his damn fussing and just give in to what she knew they _both_ wanted, but she wasn’t angry with him.

“You knew we’d have to stop,” he turned onto his side and tentatively nestled up against her back. She’d been incredibly tense all morning and he’d been careful about giving her space as not to upset her further, but the urge to try and comfort her was too damn strong. “I understand being frustrated, sweetness. But it isn’t worth the risk.”

“Maybe not to you.”

“It shouldn’t be _to you_ ,” Anakin sat up a little and peered at her over her shoulder. “Iza, you understand how serious this is, don’t you?”

“I don’t care anymore.” She muttered dully, huffing. “I want my kriffing life back. I want to be allowed to enjoy things. _This is so stupid_.”

“It’s not… _Iza_ ,” he turned her so she was on her back, staring down at her in concern. “You won’t get your life back if you continue this way.”

Iza stared up at him blankly for a few moments, and then turned her head away.

“Shouldn’t you be working on the starship?”

“ ** _Iza_** _,_ ”

“If you want me to rest, you need to leave me alone.”

“Is this really because we couldn’t have sex? _Really, sweetness?_ ” Anakin frowned at her and leaned over when she wouldn’t look at him. “I’m sorry that it pisses you off that I’m not willing to run the risk of making your condition worse, but I don’t know what you expect of me, Iza.”

“You wanted it just as much as I did,” finally, she turned to look up at him, frowning just as deeply. “You were willing to run the risk until I passed out.”

“And it was foolish of me to do so.”

“I suppose that means you’re not going to kiss me anymore either? Might as well put an end to that because we know where it leads.”

“ _Come on_ , Iza,”

“Hey—while you’re at it—go ahead and start sleeping up front like you wanted to.” Iza clenched her jaw tight for a moment before shrugging and turning back onto her side and away from him. When she spoke again, her voice wavered and she huffed out the words. “ _I don’t care_.”

“Please don’t do that. That isn’t fair, sweetness,” shaking his head at her, Anakin ran his fingers through his hair and fought back the urge to swear. “You can’t be angry with me for caring about you.”

“What’s _not fair_ is that I can’t even enjoy being stuck on this blasted sauna planet with you because of all this!” Twisting back around, Iza slapped a frustrated hand against the cot. “I can’t enjoy any of the things you make me feel or do any of the things we want to do. It’s like being back in the Temple, Anakin. Only I don’t have to worry about _dying_ at the Temple.”

He looked like he wasn’t sure what to say. When he didn’t say anything after a few minutes, Iza scoffed and rolled back over onto her side, covering her head with an arm.

“Iza,” he settled down behind her again, resting his hand on her side tentatively. She didn’t budge. Slowly, he moved it in gentle passes before bowing his head to kiss her shoulder. “Please look at me,”

“I don’t want to,” she whined, curling her legs up to her chest. He sighed quietly and nestled his face against the back of her neck.

“I know this isn’t the ideal situation, sweetness, and I’m _sorry_ ,” Anakin paused, carefully sliding his arm around her to draw her back against his chest. Surprisingly, she didn’t fight him. “If I knew I could help you in another way, I would. But I can’t. The most I can do is stop the headaches and help you rest. I don’t think it’s fair that you have to spend your time like this, either. But it’s unfair of you to expect me to act as though nothing is wrong. I can’t do it, Iza. The risks are too high.”

“Why are you like that?” Her voice was muffled by her arm, but she sounded as pouty as ever.

“Like… _what_ , sweetness?”

“Do you not care about your own needs, Anakin? Your own _wants?_ ” Lowering her arm, Iza twisted to look at him.

“I care very much, yes,” he looked confused. “These things are of great importance to me, Iza. But so are _you_.”

“Why can’t you be _selfish?_ ”

“Because my being selfish is what got us here, Iza!” He didn’t mean to shout. He didn’t mean to throw his hand out in such a way that it made her flinch. He certainly hadn’t meant to make her recoil from him like that. Pressing his lips together tightly, he shut his eyes and ran a hand through his hair. Before he could open his mouth to apologize, Iza got there first.

“What does that mean?” She looked a little on the shaken side, but at least she hadn’t moved away entirely. Anakin hesitated at first and then shook his head with a shrug.

“My selfish desire to spend time with you. That’s what it means.” Turning his hand up the younger Jedi sighed heavily. “I did not do anything to the starship nor did I instruct you to fly into an unsafe space on purpose— _before you ask_. But I continued bothering you about flight lessons for selfish reasons, Iza.” His eyes were a little sad when he looked at her again and Iza felt something cold crawl into the pit of her stomach. “You never seem to want to be in my presence at the Temple. Not unless Master Obi-Wan is around. When I learned you still had almost no flight experience, I saw an opportunity—and I took it.”

Iza felt like scum. She had never wanted Anakin to think she didn’t _like_ him despite how they may have gotten on, and she certainly had not wanted him to notice that she was fond of his master. _Sick_. She felt very sick all of a sudden.

“You can sit and say that your injury is not my fault,” Anakin continued, “But it is. You would not be in this state if it weren’t for me and my selfishness.”

“Not your fault,” Iza whispered, unsure of where to look. The headache was making it difficult to keep her eyes open and she was trying desperately not to let on that she even had one. Her face must’ve looked so stupid. “I am still the foolish one.”

“How can you say—” he paused when he noticed the way her eyes were fluttering like she was fighting to stare at a bright light. In an instant, he was settled beside her again, a thumb gently lifting her eyelids to check the state of her pupils. “Sweetness, what’s going on?”

“Hurts.” Iza gestured vaguely to her head and shut her eyes when he’d stopped checking her. She let out a soft whine when he tangled his fingers into her hair and pressed the tips against her scalp, leaning into the touch while she waited for the familiar warmth to follow. She did not expect the soft press of lips to the center of her forehead, however. Blindly tipping her head up, she managed to catch the edge of his chin and heard him quietly grunt. It took a long time for the pain to stop. When the last bit of throbbing finally ceased, Iza brought her hands up to rest her fingers against his wrists and turned onto her side to curl into his chest. They did not speak for a long while. Anakin simply held her to him and combed his fingers through her hair while Iza brushed the tips of hers in light patterns across his chest. They dozed a bit until the low rumble of thunder startled them both awake.

“ _Stars_ ,” the younger Jedi mumbled, rubbing the heel of his hand against an eye. He felt Iza snuggling in closer and glanced down curiously, unable to stop the faint smile when she nuzzled her face in the crook of his neck. He’d had every intention of getting up and maybe getting them something to eat, but now he didn’t have the heart to move. He knew she didn’t mind the storms so much. He supposed he didn’t either, but the thunder jostled him at times.

“I’m glad you were selfish,” her voice was a whisper that raised small goosebumps along his skin where her breath tickled it. “I’m glad to have gotten close to you this way, Anakin.”

He didn’t know what to say to that. Part of him felt like perhaps he should not have said so much. Maybe he should’ve kept his thoughts about how she seemed to only show up around his master to himself.

“I’m sorry I’m so difficult,” her fingers slid higher to his jaw, tracing the sharp curve and trailing to his chin. “You make me feel such lovely things, Anakin. I just wish I could enjoy them with you.”

Turning his head, Anakin nuzzled at her hair. He let his fingers twist lightly around the hair they were tangled in and gave another quiet chuckle when she tried to snuggle closer. Licking his bottom lip, he carefully turned onto his back and draped her over his chest, smiling up at her when she gazed at him curiously.

“Come here, sweetness,”

Crawling up a little higher on him, Iza carefully braced her arms on either side of his head and leaned into his palm when he settled it against her cheek. For a few moments, they just gazed at one another and traded soft smiles. And then Anakin was picking his head up from the pillow and lightly brushing his lips against hers. Iza was all too happy to lean in and return the sweet kiss, combing her fingers into his hair and sighing quietly into his mouth when he lazily skimmed his tongue along her bottom lip. They both knew they couldn’t take it terribly far. Disappointed as she was, Iza was relatively content to settle for this over nothing. If they kept it soft and slow, then there was no real _danger_ , right? Except it did not remain _soft and slow_ for long. The more they kissed, the bolder they both became. Iza slipped her legs down to straddle his waist while Anakin’s fingers found a home beneath the hem of her under-tunic. It started out innocent enough. Light little brushes against soft skin as he made quiet noises that were muffled by her mouth. Then his fingers were questing higher, pushing the material up and exposing her to the humid heat of the room.

He kept his touch as gentle as ever when he reached her breasts, smiling against her lips when Iza gasped and lifted up from his chest to give him room to cup them in his hands. Her kisses grew hungrier as he rubbed slow circles around her sensitive nipples, pinched them, and gave careful squeezes to her breasts. The fingers she had tangled in his hair began tugging and she nipped at his bottom lip more than once in surprise when he switched between his methods of teasing.

“ _Anakin_ ,” she could hardly keep her mouth fixed to his anymore, and she squirmed with every little tug and light roll he gave. She almost shouted when he let go without warning, giving him a wide-eyed look as his hands slid down to her waist to hold her in place long enough for him to roll her beneath him on the cot. He kissed her hard, nudging his hips up between her legs with a quiet growl.

“We need to be slow, Iza,” he whispered, his hands skimming back up to her chest. “No rushing. Stay mindful of your breathing.”

“I know,” she nodded at him, stealing another deep kiss. “I’ll tell you if anything changes. I promise.”

“Good,” he smiled, pressing kisses down her chin and along her neck. “Take this off,”

Giggling quietly, Iza lifted up from the cot just enough to pull the under-tunic off over her head, settling back down with her arms above her on the pillow. For a moment, she just gazed up at him, bottom lip caught between her teeth. Her eyes followed as he bowed his head and lightly trailed the tip of his tongue around one of her nipples before drawing it between his lips. His name was a quiet whimper that was nearly drowned out by a loud roll of thunder overhead, but he smiled when he heard it anyway. He was careful and he took his time, sucking in slow pulls while occasionally dragging the edges of his teeth over the aching little tip. Switching sides, he groaned as Iza buried a hand in his hair, shutting his eyes to listen to the soft moans she gave with every exhale of her breath. He heard his name again and looked up, brow quirked at the needy look on her face. He knew. He’d felt her starting to nudge her hips up from the bed and it was driving him nuts.

“Not yet,” scattering kisses over her chest, he worked his way down her torso and felt her belly shiver when the ends of his hair tickled its surface. The quiet laugh he gave must’ve tickled as well because he heard an almost nervous giggle from above him before he turned and began pressing hard kisses to the dip in her waist. Her hips jumped and she sucked in a shaky breath, the fingers in his hair pulling lightly as though she’d been surprised by the move. He didn’t look up. He only continued his way down to one hip—nipped it—then worked his way across her stomach to the other side.

“ _Anakin_ ,”

He picked his head up, mildly alarmed. Her eyes looked relatively normal, though her face was flushed. Her breathing seemed about as even as it could possibly be. He hoped she was all right.

“Yes, sweetness?”

“You do not…” she bit her lip and her face flushed a darker shade of pink. “You do not have to.”

He tilted his head at her, confused. After a moment, he flashed a smile and pressed a kiss to the spot just below her navel.

“I know,” he’d already started working her underwear down her hips. “But I would like to.”

Iza stared down at him like she wasn’t sure how to react to that. A low, shivering moan bubbled in her throat when his lips met her skin again and began brushing lower to the notch between her thighs. He skipped over it entirely, choosing to kiss the inside of one thigh, and then the other. Iza let out another nervous sounding laugh when his hair tickled her skin again, watching as he glanced up at her again. The warmth of his cheek rested against the inside of her thigh and he raised an eyebrow at her, a gentle sort of smile lifting his lips.

“Do you not want me to?”

She _really_ didn’t know how to answer that. Shrugging, she turned a hand up and then brought it to her mouth to bite down on her knuckles. Anakin snickered and pressed another kiss to her thigh.

“Sweetness,” his fingers skimmed over the surface of her belly, sweeping lower until her hips twitched again. “You’ve done this before, right?”

“ _Yes_.” Iza didn’t mean to sound so indignant about it.

“Mm,” those fingers trailed lower, brushing over a strip of velvet soft skin at the crook where her hip joined her thigh where they traced small shapes until Iza’s legs began to tremble. “Did you not enjoy it when they—”

“They didn’t.” If her face went any redder they were going to have to stop. At least she was keeping her damn breathing in check.

“ _I see_ ,” he probably shouldn’t have smirked the way that he did. Leaning in a little closer, he looked up at her over her belly and raised an eyebrow. “May I?”

She nodded, hoping she didn’t look too terribly eager. Anakin certainly didn’t seem to mind as he shot a quick smile up at her and leaned in even closer until she felt the warmth of his breath against her. Iza bit deeply into her knuckles at the first slow, hot swipe of his tongue, hips tipping upwards to follow the movement as a high pitched whine left her. She watched, fighting a whimper, as he seemed to pause for a moment and then swore under his breath before pressing his mouth against her. Iza shouted without meaning to, dropping her hands to the surface of the cot to grasp the thin blanket beneath her. He was so slow and deliberate—if not a bit _clumsy_ —with the strokes of his tongue that the brunette found she could not stay still at all. She tried desperately not to move her hips too much, though there was nothing she could do about the way her knees seemed to part or how she’d brought her feet up to rest them on his shoulders. Again, Anakin did not seem to mind at all as he smoothed his hands along her legs and continued on as though nothing drastic had changed. When he began focusing his attention on her clit, he let out a snicker when her hips jerked hard and she cussed at him.

“Too much?”

“No,” she shook her head, pressing her lips together tight to try and smother the next heavy sound that wanted to escape. He slowed his passes even more, lightening the touch until Iza could no longer control her breathing. “ _Anakin_ ,”

“Should I stop?”

“ _No_ ,” she picked her head up, shaking her head and staring at him wide-eyed. “Please don’t,”

He hummed quietly against her, eyeing her a moment. When she looked as though she might start yelling, he pressed a light kiss to her flesh and began moving his way back up her body.

“ _Anakin!_ ”

“Shh, sweetness,” his mouth found her breasts again, latching onto one to suck and nibble at it while he stroked his fingers along her hips. He almost grinned when she pushed her hips up from the bed and gave his shoulder a frustrated smack, chuckling quietly and lifting his eyes to meet hers. A brow went up before he let go of her and pursed his lips. “ _Really?_ ”

“I asked you _not_ to stop,” Iza pouted, frowning.

“You did,” he nodded and smiled, bowing his head to kiss his way across her chest. “But you were not being mindful.”

“I feel _fine!_ ”

“But wouldn’t you rather have me before you _don’t_ feel fine, sweetness?” Nuzzling a cheek against one of her bare breasts, Anakin shot her a look and tried not to smile wider. Iza almost scowled at him.

“ _You’re annoying._ ”

“I promise—” he dropped a few kisses to the center of her chest before he carefully sat up to start easing his trousers down his hips. “—when you feel better, I will spend an entire day doing this if you want me to. But I know you’ll spend the rest of the night _complaining_ if we can’t finish this properly.”

“It doesn’t have to be all day,” Iza mumbled, looking him over before bringing her hands up to run her fingers along his chest. Anakin grinned above her, shaking the trousers off with his foot. He watched her for a moment while she skimmed her fingertips over the lines of muscle on his torso, suppressing a low noise when they dropped to his abdomen and brushed below his navel.

“Do you want me to—”

“I would like to _have_ you,” he leaned over her, bracing a hand on the bed as he dipped his head to kiss her. Settling between her knees, he dipped his hips and let out a soft hiss as he rubbed hard flesh against her slowly. “You asked me to be selfish, I am going to be selfish. _This_ is what I want, Iza.”

“Me too,” she breathed, sliding her hands to his hips. “ _Anakin,_ ”

Silencing her with another kiss, Anakin shifted and sank into her carefully. He couldn’t keep from groaning into her mouth or smiling faintly when she gasped into his. When their hips met, he drew back from the kiss and looked her over, waiting. Her breathing was shallow, but well-paced enough for him not to worry too much. He’d keep to as gentle of a pace as he could manage, though he had a distinct feeling it might be difficult. Watching her lift her gaze to his, he lightly brushed a fingertip against her chin and raised an eyebrow, getting a nod in return. He moved on her, then. Set a steady, almost frustratingly slow pace that made his damn head spin. Faintly, he hoped _hers_ wasn’t spinning quite so violently. Her nails were pricking along the skin of his hips, legs shifting against his as quiet sounds resonated in her throat. She tilted her head back on the pillow and murmured sweet things to him that made him flustered enough to drop his head to try and hide the stupid faces he made. Anakin did not mind praise. It was her talk of _perfection_ and the things she found _attractive_ that made him strangely nervous. He had heard these things before, just not worded the way she worded them.

“Anakin,” her sweet voice was so breathless now as she combed her fingers through his hair and met each roll of his hips with one of her own. “ _Please_ ,”

He hesitated, if only for a moment. Nodding, he picked up the pace of his hips and shivered at the way she called out to him. He would not last at this rate. It didn’t feel as though she would either. Bowing his head, he pressed hard kisses to the damp skin of her chest, tongued her tight nipples and carefully tugged them with his teeth. She responded with harsher breathing, louder moans, quicker movements of her hips against his. The hand in his hair slid down the back of his neck and scratched its way back up in a way that made him growl. _Harder_. He couldn’t keep such careful control on himself anymore. She didn’t seem to mind. He heard her gasp sharply above him and picked his head up as she stilled and wound her legs around his waist. The way she tightened on him drew a heavy moan from his throat and he buried his face against her breasts to muffle it, working into her harder, _deeper_ until he was spent. Sinking against her, he panted into her chest while it rose and fell beneath his cheek rapidly. Neither of them moved for a while until Iza picked her hand up and threaded her fingers into his hair, a soft sigh escaping her.

“Worth it,” she giggled, making him snort.

“I don’t want to ruin the mood,” he looked up at her and smiled faintly. “But I do have to ask if you’re all right.”

Iza nodded slowly and smiled, brushing damp bits of hair away from his forehead.

“I feel fine.” After a moment, a funny look crossed her face. “There isn’t as much static in my head anymore.”

“If you tell me,” Anakin shifted to crawl up and settle his head on her shoulder, kissing her jaw. “That the cure to connecting you back to the Force is _sex_ , I’m going to throw something.”

“Maybe not just sex,” she shook her head. “The breathing. I had to concentrate so hard I think I put myself in some kind of stasis. I was still aware of everything— _clearly_. I just didn’t feel so _foggy_ anymore.”

A brow went up high on Anakin’s forehead and he grunted quietly. When she looked at him, he smiled slowly and pushed his lips against hers in a gentle kiss.

“We can experiment later. I would like to continue being selfish and enjoy the afterglow with you, sweetness.”

Iza cast an affectionate smile at him and nestled her head against his, humming.

“By all means. _Be selfish._ ”

~*~*~*~

“We have two meal bars left and half a bottle of protein water,” Anakin muttered as he rooted through the food crate. Sucking his teeth, he looked over at Iza and held the bottle out to her. “You need this. I can fill up the empties from the spring.”

“Is that water safe to drink?” She hesitated before taking the bottle. They’d been rationing everything as much as they could for the last two days but the stasis meditation was making her ravenous. She’d declined his offer to hunt something that lived in the jungle. Iza couldn’t stand the idea of killing an animal, even for food.

“Should be,” he shrugged. “I can boil it. We have a coil stove and some cookware.”

“It’s a jungle. There has to be fruit or… _something_ , right?”

Anakin laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. He hadn’t had much time to really explore much of the area outside of the starship with Iza in the condition she was. He’d been afraid to leave her for too long, even after the little _discovery_ of the stasis.

“I’m sure I can find something.” He nodded. Looking over at her, he held out one of the meal bars and smiled gently. “Eat this. All of it.”

“I will not,” shaking her head, Iza glanced at it and refused to take it. “You take half.”

“Iza,”

“ _Cyar’ika_ ,” she pursed her lips in a soft pout and Anakin felt his resolve soften. She’d started calling him that strange Mando’a word a day and a half ago and while he was still a little confused by the translation, it put a sense of warmth in his chest that was hard to ignore.

“ _Okay_ ,” Tearing open the wrapper, he broke the bar in half and gave her the bigger piece. He wouldn’t let her argue with him over it because he’d already shoved his half into his mouth. He grinned when she made a face at him, getting to his feet and coming over to drop a kiss to the top of her head before sitting beside her on the bed. “Will you be all right by yourself for a little while?”

“I think so,” she nodded, leaning on him. “I haven’t had a headache since the other day and the static is much thinner than it was. I haven’t tried reaching into the Force yet.”

“I don’t want you to do that until we go back to Coruscant,” he said firmly, giving her a look. “Even if you think you’ve gotten yourself connected again, please wait.”

“I will,” Iza promised, breaking off a piece of the meal bar to pop into her mouth. She tried to eat the thing as slowly as possible to trick her body into thinking it was getting more than it really was. It didn’t work. She always ended up cramming the rest of the damn thing into her mouth.

“Do you want to go swimming later?” Anakin asked, tilting his head in question. “I don’t think it’ll storm again.”

“We always think it won’t storm and then it _does_.”

“Do you want to go?”

“I could use a bath,” making a face, Iza plucked at her clothes and gave a light nod. “If it isn’t storming, we can go.”

Humming in satisfaction, Anakin leaned over and kissed the side of her head. He got to his feet and stretched his arms over his head with a growl before sighing.

“Okay, I won’t be long.” Starting for the door, he paused long enough to root through the crate for a sack to put the empty water bottles into, as well as some containers in case he found some sort of edible fruit on the way.

“Be safe, _cyar’ika_ ,”

Looking up, Anakin smiled at the soft look Iza was giving him.

“I will, sweetness.” Rising to his full height, he turned and headed out of the starship.

~*~*~*~

“ _What_ is this?” Iza stared into the container Anakin had set on the table, squinting suspiciously.

“Fruit.” He muttered nonchalantly with a shrug, pulling water bottles from the sack to set them out. The water was clear enough, but he’d boil it later to make the brunette a little more comfortable about drinking it.

“Why is it _moving_ , Anakin?”

“Is it?” Picking the container up, he tilted it to look inside and shook his head. “Looks fine to me, sweetness,”

“ _This_ is fruit,” reaching into the sack, Iza pulled a few brightly colored, sweet smelling globes from the bottom and then pointed to the container. “I don’t know what _that_ is.”

“Berries, sweetness. Berries.”

“Berries do not _move_ , Anakin!”

“You are seeing things,” he gave her a look and shook his head, waving a finger. “These are just fine.”

Iza didn’t trust him. There was just _something_ about the supposed berries that bothered her. Maybe he didn’t see it, but they appeared to _crawl_ over one another. She hadn’t had any problems with hallucinations since her accident. Iza was pretty sure these were not _berries_ at all.

“I brought you something else,” Anakin drew her attention away from the container and her features softened when he presented her with a tiny sprig of blue flowers. They were a little crushed in places from being in the bag, but they were still very pretty.

“ _Anakin_ ,” her heart felt like it was melting in her chest. It was such a sweet gesture. Taking them, she looked them over for a moment before looking back up at him and pulling him to her, setting her chin in the middle of his chest. He smiled at her and brushed his knuckles against her cheek before bowing to kiss her.

“I thought you’d like them.”

“I adore them,” she whispered, leaning into the touch. “I adore _you_.”

They both seemed to reel back from the shock her words brought with them. Iza looked embarrassed for a moment, like she’d startled herself by saying it out loud. Anakin looked startled in general. He let out a nervous laugh, like he wasn’t sure if he ought to take her seriously or not. Tilting his head, he knit his brows and watched Iza’s face flicker through about three different confused emotions before she settled on something like acceptance. When she looked up at him again, she nodded and smiled nervously, leaning into his chest.

“ _I do._ ”

Another one of those breathless laughs left him before he was cupping her face and pulling her in for a sweet, tender kiss. Iza giggled softly into his mouth, the sound light and still a bit nervous. When they broke away, her eyes were bright and there was a light flush to her cheeks. Anakin’s face was no better. His cheeks had gone quite pink but he couldn’t bring himself to hide away this time. They both gave the same happy sounding sigh and Iza popped up onto her toes when Anakin bowed to touch his forehead to hers, his thumb smoothing across the swell of her cheek.

“I adore you too, sweetness,” he said quietly, dropping a kiss to the bridge of her nose. “But I bet you already knew that.”

“Kind of,” she grinned and poked her tongue out between her teeth teasingly. “But I like hearing it.”

“I do too,” humming, he pulled back with some reluctance and glanced back at the things he’d brought back with him, seeming to contemplate something. He looked back when Iza tugged at his tunic, finding her giving him a suspicious look.

“What’s really in the container, _cyar’ika?_ ”

“I told you,” he couldn’t keep the smile from creeping across his lips. “ _Berries._ ”

“Eat one.”

“Okay,” turning a hand up, Anakin pulled away from her and went to pick the container up, taking the lid off. Pulling one of the little purple _berries_ from inside, he held it up and then popped it into his mouth, chewing nonchalantly. “See? They’re perfectly fine, sweetness.”

Iza still did not trust this.

“You can eat them yourself.” She shook her head and put her hands up. “I will be fine with the other fruit.”

“Oh come on,” plucking another berry from the container, he placed the lid back onto it and approached her. “Just try it. You’ll enjoy them.”

“I do not want it, Anakin,” Iza backed away from him, glancing over her shoulder to make sure she wasn’t about to trip on one of his tools.

“Sweetness,” he gave her a look. “You _have_ to eat. We don’t have much to choose from out here.”

Looking from the round berry Anakin held, up to his face and back again, Iza hesitated. She could swear she saw the damn thing _pulsing_. But she’d just seen him eat one. It hadn’t hurt him. Maybe her eyes were playing tricks from all of the meditation. She couldn’t be sure. He was right, though. She needed to eat and there wasn’t much to choose from since she refused to let him kill anything. Closing her eyes tight, she opened her mouth and heard him step closer to place the fruit into her mouth. There was a distinct _crunch_ that no berry she’d ever eaten before had. A _pop_ that flooded her mouth with bittersweet juice that left a tang on her tongue she wasn’t sure she liked. It took effort for her to continue chewing and as she swallowed, she felt something get stuck in her throat. Coughing, she reached in and pulled out— _a wing._

“ ** _ANAKIN SKYWALKER_** _!!_ ” Her horrified scream filled the starship and she felt the contents of her stomach creeping back up her throat. Turning to race down the loading ramp, she lost her footing and toppled over the side before she heaved into the dirt, coughing and gagging while her stomach rolled painfully. _A bug._ He’d fed her a damn _bug_. He’d **eaten** a damn bug like it was no big deal. Pounding her fist against the side of the starship as she dry heaved and fought to breathe, Iza felt a harsh dizziness swirl in her head and threaten to pull her under and undo all of the work she’d done these last few days.

“ _Iza!_ ” Strong hands lifted her from the dirt, pulling her to her feet and hauling her back against a warm chest. A bottle of water was pressed to her lips and she drank from it greedily, fighting against the urge to vomit again. When the dizziness waned and she was able to breathe again, Iza turned and smacked her hands against Anakin’s shoulders.

“You _disgusting_ animal!” She could still taste the damn thing on her tongue. She was going to vomit again. “ ** _YOU FED ME A BUG_** _?!_ ”

Anakin laughed. He couldn’t help it. Even when she swatted at him again, he nearly doubled over and started crying with laughter. His hands came up to cover his face so she wouldn’t accidentally smack him and when she finally stopped yelling, he reached out and pulled her into his arms. Squeezing her even as she huffed and scowled at him, he bowed his head and kissed the top of hers.

“I’m sorry, sweetness,” he chuckled, rubbing his hands along her back. “I really didn’t think you’d notice.”

“You’re _gross_ ,” she grumbled, thumping her head against the middle of his chest. “How _dare_ you?”

“They’re not that bad,”

“ _It is a **bug** , Anakin!_”

“It is _sustenance_ , sweetness,” running his fingers through her hair, he let out a final snicker and shook his head. “When you’re stuck out in a place like this, you learn to eat what you can as long as it isn’t poisonous.”

“You can keep your filthy bugs.” Iza growled, finally winding her arms around him. “I will starve before I eat another one of those nasty things.”

“I will not let you starve,” nestling his cheek against the top of her head, he sighed quietly and held her closer. “The tree I found with your preferred fruit is full enough to keep you fed. I just ran out of room.”

“I want to see this tree,” Iza muttered, giving him a look.

“You don’t trust me?”

“ _No_.”

“I guess that’s fair,” tipping his head lightly, he smiled down at her and kissed her forehead. “Are you all right? You fell pretty hard.”

“I’m fine. The ground is soft from the rain.” Her knees ached a little, but she wasn’t injured.

“You’re filthy.” Drawing back, Anakin plucked at Iza’s trousers and raised an eyebrow. “Did you want to go swimming or are you too angry with me?”

“Will you feed me a waterbug next?” She shot him an accusing look and Anakin frowned.

“Sweetness,” the touch of his hand on her cheek was gentle and meant to soothe. “I apologize. Sincerely. I didn’t think it would be such a big deal to you.”

“If you had been _honest_ , it wouldn’t have been.” Iza pinched her mouth in a tight frown, brows forked downward. “You kept insisting they were _berries_ , Anakin. If you’d said they were bugs and _edible_ I might’ve felt different.”

“That’s fair as well,” he nodded, lightly running his finger along her cheek. “I won’t try to feed you anything foreign again. I promise.”

“ _Good_.” Eyeing him, Iza stood on her toes to kiss his chin. “I apologize for hitting you. I should not have done that.”

“It’s all right,” he smiled faintly and shrugged. “Didn’t hurt much.”

“I don’t care. I typically do not strike out like that.” Shaking her head, she made a face. “Even when I’m upset, I don’t become violent.”

Anakin studied her for a moment and brushed the hair away from her forehead. Letting out a quiet sigh, he smiled when she looked up at him questioningly, leaning in to nuzzle at her hairline.

“I’ll grab the soap. Stay here, sweetness. I’ll only be a minute.”

“Anakin?”

“Hm?”

Iza looped her arms around his waist and pulled him in close, tipping her head up and brushing her mouth against his chin. She smiled when he looked at her with that curious expression, standing on her toes to kiss the end of his nose and press her forehead to his cheek. She couldn’t reach his forehead.

“Thank you, _cyar’ika_ ,”

“Thank you?” He tilted his head, confused, and gave a lopsided smile.

“For caring the way that you do.” She looked at him with such adoration that it made his whole chest swell with warmth. “Disgusting as it is, I don’t think anyone else would feed me a _bug_ to make sure I didn’t go hungry. You are so sweet, _cyar’ika_. I stand by what I said about being glad that I got the chance to get close to you this way. You make me very happy.”

That stupid, flustered noise left him and he dropped his head, knocking hers gently in the process. He couldn’t hide that dumb smile this time. Not with her right in his face like that. It softened to something a little less _goofy_ when she started kissing at his cheek and he tilted his head to nestle it against hers, winding his arms around her and pulling her tight against his chest. He wasn’t sure of what to say, or if he should say anything at all. He felt as though she’d said enough for both of them. After a few moments, he gave a quiet chuckle and kissed the side of her head.

“You’re going to kill me with all of these sweet things you say to me.”

“You will not _die_ , Anakin,” Iza snickered, smiling. “You look so cute when you’re flustered, though.”

“ _Stop it_ ,” he waved his finger at her as he tried to fight back another bashful expression. “You _stop_.”

“Go get the soap,” she smiled brightly up at him and reached to give his chin the tiniest pinch. “My sweet, adorable _cyar’ika_ ,”

He blew out a hard breath and backed away from her to head into the starship, shaking his head and grinning like a damn fool. He hated it. He hated how damn hard he blushed when she said these things. Hated how fluttery his stomach became and how his breathing seemed to come in short, choppy waves he couldn’t control. But _man_ —he couldn’t deny how nice it was to hear her say it after having pined for so long. He would gladly put up with these stupid moments of feeling like a goofy idiot just to hear her say _nice_ things. He would need to remember to return the favor. He wanted to see if he could get her to make the same silly faces. She was probably really cute when she got flustered the way he did.

~*~*~*~

“Are you _sure_ you don’t want one?” Anakin asked from where he sat boiling the drinking water and occasionally snacking on one of the _berries_ he’d brought back with him. Looking up from the datapad she’d finally been allowed to read, Iza stared at him, horrified.

“ _Cyar’ika_ , I do not want your bugs,” she felt ill just thinking about the earlier experience. “I told you—I’m fine with the fruit.”

“You need protein, Iza.”

“I will find another way to get it. I am not eating another one of those _things_.” Shuddering, the brunette looked back at the screen in her lap and scrolled through, propping her cheek against her knuckles to continue reading. She’d missed being able to drift off into a text for hours. She was having just a _little_ difficulty concentrating, but she was pretty sure it had more to do with the fact that she could hear Anakin crunching away on _whatever_ those bugs were than anything else. Her eyes kept going bleary, though. That was new. She wasn’t particularly tired even though they’d horsed around quite a bit at the waterfall. A tiny smile spread across her lips at the memory of the way he’d kissed her just behind the curtain of water while the mist sprayed them and dampened their warm skin. She was vaguely aware of the fact that she was biting at her fingertip, but had no idea just how wide her grin had gotten—nor how dreamy.

“What’s that all about? What are you reading over there?” Anakin asked, jerking her out of her thoughts.

“What?” Blinking, she looked at him for a moment and then glanced at the datapad before shaking her head. “It’s just a history text. Why?”

“That’s an awfully bright smile for a _history text_.”

“Oh.” Iza let out a rushed breath and laughed. “I wasn’t reading. I was thinking.”

“ _About?_ ”

“Nothing, Bug Boy.” She poked her tongue out at him and grinned at the sour face he made. “Come on _cyar’ika,_ I’m teasing.”

“You’re very mean,” he put the lid back on the container and turned the stove off to let the water cool. “I would tell _you_ what I was thinking about if I was smiling like that.”

“So it’s not _Bug Boy_ that has you making that face?”

“I’ve been called worse things.”

That made Iza frown for half a second. She knew, of course, that some of his agemates—and _hers_ —had not been kind to him growing up. It put a strange kind of tightness in her chest to think about some of the things she’d heard in the Temple hallways. Watching him, she turned the datapad off and set it aside.

“Wash your mouth out and come here.”

Anakin’s brows went up high on his forehead but he didn’t argue. Taking a quick drink from one of the bottles of water that had already been purified, he came over to where Iza sat and laughed when she tugged him down to the floor with her. He settled between her knees when she parted them, resting his back against her chest and propping his head on her shoulder with a smile. It grew when her fingers tangled into his hair and she brushed her lips against his temple, his eyes shifting to look at her.

“Are you going to tell me?” He asked, draping his arms carelessly across her thighs. Iza’s cheeks flushed a light shade of pink and she turned to bury her face in his hair. He could hear the _softest_ giggle rising in her throat before she sighed.

“The waterfall,” Iza whispered, rubbing her fingers in slow circles against his scalp until he began tilting into the touch and groaning quietly.

“The waterfall?” It was hard to tell if he was _sleepy_ or just _relaxed_. “The waterfall made you smile like that?”

“ _Anakin_ ,” she wound her free arm around his shoulders and snuggled in close against his back. “ _Think_ , _cyar’ika_ ,”

He was already smiling. _He knew_.

“I wonder what else I’ve done that has made you smile like that,” he glanced at her from the corner of his eye and trailed a fingertip along her leg, watching in amusement as Iza’s face turned _scarlet_. A flabbergasted sound left her and she quickly pressed her face to the top of his shoulder to hide it, making him burst out in laughter. “Oh, _sweetness_ ,”

“ _Monster_ ,” she whined, voice muffled. “You did that on purpose!”

“I might have,” grinning when she picked her head up, he leaned over and kissed one of her rosy cheeks. “But you _do_ think about it. I know you do.”

“ _Anakin!_ ” Iza couldn’t hide her face fast enough. He wouldn’t let her. He’d turned in her lap already and caught her by the chin with gentle fingers.

“You begged for it, sweetness, and now you’re _shy?_ ” Tilting his head, he knit his brows as an amused smile spread across his lips. “Or is it something _specific_ making you so flustered?”

“ _Skywalker, I swear—_ ”

He kissed her. Perhaps a bit too roughly, but Iza would not complain. It took a moment for the tension to ease out of her before she could return it, fingers lightly pawing down the side of his neck as she did. She was _very_ aware of the way his tongue moved in delicate strokes inside of her mouth and she shivered when he drew her bottom lip between his teeth and nipped it gently. When he broke away to nuzzle his nose across hers, she opened her eyes a fraction to look at him and found him already smiling back at her.

“Would you like me to do it again?”

“ _Fuck_ ,” Iza looked horribly startled that the word had left her tongue and she brought a hand up to cover her mouth as her eyes went impossibly wide. Anakin only raised an eyebrow at her, his expression unreadable. After a moment, he shrugged.

“We can do that too.”

“ ** _Anakin_** _!_ ”

“You don’t need to be shy, sweetness,” he chuckled quietly and took her hand away from her mouth, kissing her knuckles. “I think we were well past the _shy_ stage a long time ago.”

“It’s different when you talk about it so casually,” Iza murmured, eyeing him. “Especially something like _that._ ”

“Mm,” humming, he kissed her hand again and smiled wide. “You still have not answered my question.”

Iza stared at him for a moment like she was trying to recall whether or not a question had even been asked. When she realized what he meant, she huffed out a breath through her nose and looked away without saying anything. Anakin waited, giving her a few moments before he nudged at her chin and chuckled when she still refused to look in his direction. Leaning in, he kissed his way along her jaw to her ear, giving it a tiny tug with his teeth.

“ _You begged me not to stop, sweetness,_ ” he nearly grinned at the sharp way she inhaled and the way her nails dragged along the side of his neck. “I think I know what the answer is even if you won’t say it.”

“ _Cyar’ika_ ,” giving him a sidelong look, Iza tried not to shiver when he continued nipping at her ear.

“Later,” he murmured, kissing her cheek. “When I’ve woken you when I go for my cigarette. I will let you have as much as you want, sweetness.”

“ _You better stop,_ ”

“I will for now,” another kiss was dropped to her cheek before Anakin got up from his spot to go check on the water. “But later— _you’re mine, sweetness_.”

Iza could no longer suppress the shiver that ran down her back as she stared after him. She had no idea what the hell had come over him so suddenly. She also wasn’t sure if she hated it. They’d spent so long locked in frustration around one another that _maybe_ this was just a byproduct of that. She didn’t know. All she knew was that she needed to get some damn air. Muttering something about doing just that, she grabbed her datapad and got up, hearing Anakin snicker behind her as she went to go sit on the loading ramp to continue reading.

In the back of her head, she found herself almost _excited_ for bedtime.


End file.
